So, I know im not the only one on this earth who is bipolar, and I just so happen to be manic as we speak.. and I have some very hilarious things that I do when I go manic, so I figured id share some of mine, and laugh about it a bit, and anyone is very free to laugh with me, or even share theirs. 😅

So for starters.. I started frantically rearranging, redesigning, and cleaning ALL of my fish tanks at 10 PM.. was insanely entertaining.

I went and started rearranging my living room furniture after that.. why? No clue. But its very pretty now, LOL.

Next started the frantic scrubbing of the tile grout..

Then I called my lovely mother (even though we still live in the same house) and started speed talking her ear off about the dumbest things for the next hour and a half. I finally went to bed at 6 AM, and now I am deep cleaning the coffee pot? And microwave? Its been eventful. 😂

How many fish tanks do you have and what's stocked in them? I had a couple: a 60 gallon with harlequin raspboras, mollies, and minnows, a 5 gallon for the bullied minnows, and a 2 gallon as a backup, which came in handy once they started breeding. That came to an end when I ended up in the hospital and couldn't care for them anymore 🙁

Y'all live in the same house and you still called her 😂

Got my bipolar diagnosis at 21 when I had a downward manic spiral and became non-functional; I'll be 34 this week and I've found a combination of medicines and therapy that works for me. However, I have unfortunately been through a few periods in which my meds were inconsistent or I wasn't taking them at all, and this triggers my mania pretty quickly. It's not all bad and that's something that was explained to me with my diagnosis, and it finally explained my sleepless periods of ravenous creativity with art and music. When I'm on an "upward" manic swing, I have all the confidence in the world, ideas flowing nonstop, the desire to do all the things at once, and I'm excited about being alive. I talk fast and say shit I'd otherwise not really say -- mostly oversharing and jumping from topic to topic like lightning (I also have ADHD, so believe me, the combination of that + bipolar mania is insanity). Risky behavior. Feeling indestructible. On the other hand, the "downward" mania spirals are hell. I was in and out of it all this past winter and almost got a divorce. I hate myself, I'm self-destructive, aggressive, irratic, I can't concentrate, and I won't get into the darker aspects of it for reasons that will be obvious if you also have the disorder.

If anyone is ever struggling with this stuff, my inbox is open here and on my main account (Stormsong). I'm not a doctor or therapist but I've been there.

I have 6 tanks, 3 that arent in use that I still have decor in! I cleaned the 10 gallon, 20 gallon, and the 3.5 gallon. I have a relatively large female betta (insanely spoiled) in the 10 gallon for starters! My 40 gallon, 1 gallon (snails!!), and 55 gallon arent in use. I still rearranged the tank decor though.. 😅

I have another female betta (very itty bitty, and had refused to grow, or she would be in a larger tank as well, trust me!) in the 3.5 gallon.

And I have 3 golden zebra loaches, 7 platys (multiple kinds. Mickey, red wag, etc.), and A neon tetra (shes done just fine by herself, although ive tried to give her many tank mates, and they continuously die, lol. She socializes with the platys honestly. LOL.)

sitting in the 20 gallon right now, and I am planning on moving them to the 55 gallon eventually! From there ill expand my stock a bit, lol.

-

And yes! I called her in the same damn house! 😂

This honestly made me feel 10x better about myself, as ive never heard anyone else who was able to go into such depth about their mania. I have ADHD as well, and it.. we'll say spices things up, LOL. It gets quite interesting for sure. They suspect I have Borderline Personality as well, so after I get settled in a little more with different medications (im type 2, its been interesting, yet again) and find what works for me, they plan on bringing me back in to look over that as well. I got very lucky, and my mother came around after a while of denial for years.. after having bipolar and borderline explained to her, she can tell when im starting to go manic before I even do. I start taking care of myself as it starts, and cant differ at the time if im going manic? Or if im actually trying to start taking care of myself and getting better. I get paranoid over the smallest things, which I figured was simply severe anxiety for the longest. I fill up with loads of life, and start getting back into old hobbies that spark my creativity. Crocheting, sowing, writing, reading, painting, makeup, etc. Im very self aware of the things I do, which makes coming down a little worse.. but I do some interesting things on the way up, LOL. I talk fast, I start talking passionately about things for hours on end, and many many other things. I just get so excited, and start over sharing with strangers as well.
Its made relationships insanely difficult, as im still getting a grip on things really. 19, almost 20, and the doctor kinda pointed it out by the time I was 17, and sent me to a psychiatrist. Life got in the way of me seeing said psychiatrist.. and fast forward a couple years later, im finally seeing her. I got insanely lucky with them catching it early, but I kinda figured everything about me was normal when I was much younger. Took my best friend quite literally monitoring everything I react to, how I act, how I treat people, etc.. over an entire year, and her showing me what she *found* at the end of it to realize that these things absolutely werent normal. The god complex is insanity with me. I start to feel like the world revolves around me. 😂 I do some very funny things though all in all in the light of it.