(Pfft I think it gave me good luck, got second place like 6 times and first twice, I never do that well against real people, only AI, so thank you xD)

Lieutenant Calvert

ᓚᘏᗢ

"Go right ahead then, dumb smart guy," Norrie snorted. "Fuck you Hubert, no wonder you were a terrorist," She laughed cruelly, shaking her head. What a name. It explained a lot. Nobody named HuBerT ever turned out right. Whether or not they were all terrorists Norrie had no clue, but not a single one of them went on to just be your typical guy. Nope. Them's was drug dealers, drag queens, just weird dudes. "Ooh nice. Can you turn them inside out?" She asked. That would be a little harder, since unlike socks, human flesh didn't do so well when you reached in it and pulled it wrong way out. Blegh. "You've just about nailed it. It just needs a little..." Norrie flicked the lesser dried blood from her hands at him, adding droplets to the mural of blood already painted across him. "There, perfect!" She chirped cheekily. Not like he'd retaliate in any way, nosiree. "Yeah, and we've got a new kid who'd be overjoyed if you'd let him have a look at that," She snorted, inclining her head toward his cyborg arm. "Hey, first off, that wasn't my rule, second, I'll tear a new asshole into anyone who tries to argue. Now c'mon, lets go see Big Jim." She led him across the compound to what was referred to as simply The Shop, a long, almost barn-like building with two bigass roll-up doors. Along the wall opposite the main doors were basically oversized parking spots, numbered one through twenty-five, though most were empty.

"AY BIG JIM. GIT YER ASS OUT HERE," Norrie hollered, and an admittedly well fed guy came lumbering over from where he'd been tinkering with a humvee, wiping his dirty mitts with an equally dirty rag. "Whaddaya need? Can't you people see I'm BUSY?" He huffed. Norrie cast him a glare and asked, "S'The Beak around?" The Beak was the new kid- Freddy Holt. Good with anything with a motor and/or computer. "Yuh," Big Jim said, "FREDDY!" A scrawny little fellow came jogging over from who-cares-where. The Beak was perhaps a hundred and ten pounds soaking wet, and the casual observer might be tempted to believe sixty of it was nose. The Beak eyed Axl wearily at first, then his gaze fell on the cyborg parts, and he almost looked like a kid in a toy shop.

(Good job xD)

-

Axl, Destroyer of Sane People

-

"All the Hubert's of this world deserve to die. If you were named Hubert, you're just a bad person." Axl snorted, shaking his head. Lucky for him, he was NOT named Hubert. Then again... he wasn't named Axl either. That was the name he took up because he didn't want people to know his real name. No one deserved to. They'd only say a beast like him didn't deserve a real name. "If I remove enough bones." He responded with an evil smile, fangs flashing. "And use my cyborg hand." He added with a sniff. He had actually done it before, with lots of rips and tears, and the human didn't resemble a human after he was done. Axl glanced down as she flicked blood onto his chest, wrinkling his nose slightly. "Uh huh. You fixed the masterpiece. It is now perfect. I'm glad we've been painting with blood together. On a perfect canvas, I may add." He stated drily. "He can look but he ain't gonna touch." Axl lifted his chin slightly. He didn't need to explain himself, but he was adamant on that. He would rip anyone's hands off who tried to touch him. "Sure. Whatever you say." He snorted, following her with his long, silent strides. He avoided some mud, as he was okay with blood on his delightful boots but not mud. His ears twitched forward as they entered and he sniffed the air, all the oily smells and dirt and grime entering his nose. He loved the smells of mechanic shops. He stood silently, like a sentry, with hands folded behind his back, as they spoke. Ish. Or yelled at each other. When the beaky child came over, he tilted his head slightly, watching them with slightly narrowed eyes. "I just need a space and some tools, mkay?" He stated flatly, his shoulders stiff.

(Why thank you x3)

Lieutenant Calvert

ᓚᘏᗢ

"And Mackenzeighs, and Heighleighs, and Toughneighs," Norrie added. (I hate that Tony can be spelled like that T-T) She'd even met an Ashtrae once. Her parents were obviously both stupid in the head and heavy smokers. The house always reeked of cigarettes and they were walking fire hazards. "Awesome. Could you stuff one inside the other?" She asked. Live Russian nesting dolls. Or, dead ones. Fleshy ones. Delightful. "Perfect's a liiiittle bit of an overstatement, but sure," Norrie mused. He was no Arnold Schwarzenegger, but sure as hell better than The Beak in terms of physique. And olfactory proportion. "Hey, not my hand, not my problem," She said with a shrug. He didn't want The Beak touching him that was a-okay with Norrie.

Big Jim just shrugged his meaty shoulders and said, "Alright then. Freddy'll show you where everything is." He clapped the kid on the shoulder, making him stumble forward a little, before lumbering back to the vehicle he was messing with. "You okay here unsupervised?" She asked Axl a little teasingly. Then, to The Beak, "Freddy, you mind your manners, 'kay? I'll be back with something for you." Freddy nodded, snapped off a quick, if a little sloppy salute, and Norrie left, making her way back across the compound, past the artful pile of now-stinking corpses, and out of the remains of the wall.

Axl apparently hadn't let the deserter get far, and Norrie found the truck easily enough. An old civillian rust bucket that might've been light blue from the factory judging by the color under the chipping green and brown and armored in an obviously home-done job. Still, it ran, and -bonus points- rolled coal. It started up easily enough, and Norrie found uot quickly enough one had to damn near stand on the brake to get it to come to a full stop. Lovely. She drove it back and parked it outside the shop - she didn't want it to enter a closed space while running. Norrie left it unlocked with the key in the ignition - who's gonna steal that piece of shit? - and Big Jim came out to see what she'd brought. "Where'd'ya get that pile of camel shit?" He asked gruffly, to which Norrie grinned. "Stole it from the bastards with explosives." She didn't feel the need to say those were the ones currently piled up by the remains of the wall, as that was pretty damn obvious. "Uh-huh," Was all Big Jim said before going back to his work.

Axl, Mostly Man Sorta Thing With A Physique That APPARENTLY Doesn't Match Arnold Schwarzenegger's

-

Axl nodded his agreement, then pondered it for a second. "If I gut them both first and one is considerably bigger than the other." He finally answered with a nod. "I haven't done that, but it's a good idea." If you really needed just the skins and wanted to conserve space ... why the hell not. He'd just have to rip a big goddamn hole in the stomach. "That's better than nothing." He grinned crookedly, head slightly tilted. (Holy frigging hell, I thought olfactory was another word for the organs in the land down under and I was like HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MANY FUCKING NAMES FOR THOSE and then I was like AND THAT DOESN'T SEEM THAT HARD then I looked it up and I was like OOOOOHHHHHH THAT MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE XD)

.

Axl inclined his head slightly and glanced at Norrie with an arch of his brow. "In all seriousness, you'd better not expect perfection. Or Live mechanics." He offered a flat smile. As soon as she left, he turned to skinny bean and looked expectantly at them. They immediately started walking, going to a mostly empty table with a toolbox nearby and explaining that Axl could use what he wanted. He nodded and went to the toolbox, selecting a couple tools before walking over to the table. His arm was very much attached to him and would not be coming off, so he had to bend around to look at it. Quite uncomfortably. The top of it, anyway, where the metal was torn. He first reattached the wires... thankfully the only ones that had been severed were the ones that controlled the movement of the dagger in his hand. He then found a piece of titanium somewhere and started melting it and shaping it. When he was finished, he covered the opening, molded it some more, let it cool, and it was as good as new. Obviously it was a BIT more complicated than that but I'm in a hurry. He grabbed some oil and lubricants and shit and started cleaning and fixing up the rest of the arm. By the time Norrie drove in, it was shining again, looking brand new. Pleased with his work, he tossed down the now dirty rag. His other hand was covered in black grease stains and a little had gotten on his face and chest too somehow. A masterpiece made even better. Blood and grease. Perfect.

Lieutenant Calvert

ᓚᘏᗢ

"In that case, I'll be arranging these things in order of size, I wanna se that," Norrie said, grinning. Sounded delightful. And THEN if you stick your hand on the bigger one, you have a double sock puppet made outta meat! "Guess so," She said, trying her damned hardest to ingore his oddly endearing grin. Oh fuck. (I swear I spent a solid 4 minutes laughing over "organs from thr land down under" like aussies have weird intenstines or some shit xD Prolly do since those mfs eat spiders ;_;)

"Hey c'mon now, I'm trusting you- I DO expect perfection," She said pointedly, and her lack of arguing about live mechanics made The Beak visibly nervous. Poor bastard. Oh well, too bad, so sad.

When Norrie went back inside to find Axl and Freddy, she did find them, though not at ALL in the state she'd left 'em in. Somehow Axl'd managed to get grease just about everywhere he could without rolling around in the stuff, and Norrie could help but laugh a little. "Aw geez... can't leave you alone for more than twenty minutes or this happens, huh?" She mused, shaking her head and grinning. "I take back what I said earlier. Now you look like a car at the junkyard with a brand fuckin new hood." That summed it up pretty well; like part of an old junker had been replaced with pristine shit while the rest remained untouched. But boys will be boys, and Axl was obviously ne exception. Annnnd it was better than being stuck with a prettyboy afraid to get his mitts dirty.

Axl, Person Whom You Can Put In A White Empty Room and He Will Still Manage To Get Dirty

-

"I wouldn't be able to do it more than ONCE, that'd be damn near impossible. Unless it was like a Ronan sized shitweasel (ima use the name because I can't think of anyone bigger xD, play along) and the smallest was a child. Or a dwarf. On that note, I'm not killing a fucking child to do this." Axl snorted, wrinkling his nose as he thought about it. It'd be hard enough to get one in. Even if he completely deboned both. At least it'd be an entertaining time consuming thing. (Aussies are NOT NORMAL okay!? XD)

.

"Considering you won't admit I AM perfection, I cannot GIVE you perfection." He sniffed, ignoring The Beak's queasy look. If the guy didn't touch him, he wouldn't touch them.

.

Axl glanced up as he heard a laugh, nose twitching as he realized Norrie had entered. He was a little busy cleaning up the area he had worked in. Not himself. "This is the best thing that could've possibly happened. You should be thankful there's not more blood and a body hung from the rafters." He scoffed, finding a clean rag and stretching his wing around in front of him, starting to polish the metal. "Oh how thoughtful of you." He huffed sarcastically. "Well I'm GLAD you think I did a good job on the arm." With a pleased look, he stretched out the shiny new metal and pulled his fingers into a fist before letting them go out again. It did look much better. He focused his attention back on the wings, knowing they'd take quite a bit longer. However, he wanted to do a damn good job. This was the first time he had to clean them in a long fucking time. He spread his feathers slightly and made sure to wipe the whole surface, pleased to see the shiny metal underneath the dirt and grime start to show again. Sadly, cleaning the dried grease and blood off of his chest would NOT be as easy. Maybe he'd just leave it there.

Lieutenant Calvert

ᓚᘏᗢ

"Could you debone them completely, roll up the flesh real tight, and stuff 'em all in the bigger one?" Norrie asked. "And thanks for not killing a child," She snorted. (lol okay) That might work... so long as they had very little fat or muscle and were just skin and connective tissue. Might have to behead them, and deboning a person was not at all like deboning a fish, sadly, but if you had surgical tools and a shitton of free time, hey, be my guest. (No they ain't xD)

"Admit? There's nothing TO admit. If you were imperfect you'd be boring as shit," Norrie shorted, rollling her eyes. He could take that how he wanted, point was, people without problems are very lame people indeed.

"Uh-huh," She said skeptically, "I guess I'm thankful for that, sure." Then again... who didn't love a fleshy disco ball? The worst part would probably be pressure washing the bloodstains outta the concrete, but even then it wasn't TOO difficult. "Yes I'm very thoughtful," She said, "Hey, I do give credit where credit's due. Sometimes." Big fat sometimes. Usually not. The best most people got was a small grunt of approval, nothing more, nothing less.

Norrie's gaze fell on The Beak, and she said, "Freddy! Come look what I found." He followed obediently to the truck, and his whole face lit up. "You said you found this thing?" He asked. The short answer was no. "Well yes, but actually no. I stole it from some terrorists," Norrie answered as if this were a daily occurence, making Freddy's eyes go wide. He turned his attention back to the vehicle, and said nothing more on the subject of how it came to be. "You can fuck around with it, I don't really care," She said, and Freddy looked like the world's happiest dog who just found the motherload of tennis balls.

At least he's okay xD)

-

Axl, Flesh Roller

-

Axl pondered it for a moment before nodding slowly. "I bet I could. Especially if I had a press or some shit. That'd be FUN." He smiled brightly, not a real smile but a OHMYGOSHIMIGHTGETTODEBONEPEOPLEANDSTUFFTHEMINOTHERPEOPLE smile. "You're so very welcome. I do have some limits." He sniffed. He would never kill an innocent child. If someone was hurting a child, he WOULD kill them.

.

"True true. People without problems are boring." He sighed in acceptance. "On the bright side, I didn't burn down the shop, so be thankful." Axl added sternly, flicking a bit of metal shaving off of his shoulder.

.

He was now truthfully looking forward to seeing if he could stuff another body in a body, or a couple of them.... then he remembered that he was instructed NOT to do a shitton. Which meant he may or may not have made his ribs/concussion worse. Eh, he'd probably be fine. He hadn't noticed any super big pains. He rolled his eyes at her words. "Totally believable." He mumbled, rubbing the rag a bit harder on a muddy spot.

.

He finished an okay job on the wings... honestly, it was pretty good. They now shone like fucking diamonds. He tucked them towards himself and rubbed the back of his neck with a sigh, likely spreading more grease there. Then, after a moment, he glanced around, sniffed the air, and headed over to where The Beak and Norrie were. He observed the car for a moment, arms crossed over his chest. "Apolgies about the hole in the roof." He finally stated, glancing at the roof where a giant jagged hole had been viciously ripped into the metal. There were probably better ways to get the guy, but he had been irritated.

(my thoughts exactly xD His gobbler tendencies -and the fact we don't live on a busy street- saved his fat ass xD)

Lieutenant Calvert

ᓚᘏᗢ

"Oh I think that could be arranged," Norrie said. There was probably a hydraulic press or some shit that could be used like one in the shop. Just gotta clean it when finished.

"See, when am I ever wrong?" She said with a big shiteating grin.

"And you didn't set yourself on fire," She added. Better than could be said for Jackson- he'd done EXACTLY that once. Luckily he possessed the smarts to stop, drop, and roll, and was unharmed - except for his dignity - and learned not to do that again. And also that Norrie was NOT going to feel bad for him if he did in the slightest- she'd just yell at him. And maybe find water or a fire extinguisher when she was done yelling about how FUCKING STUPID he was.

Freddy shook his head, grinning widely enough that Norrie was afraid he'd split his face open. "Not a problem, I've fixed up worse." That was why he'd been stationed here; that crafty bugger was good with vehicles n shit. Norrie looked Axl over once more, and nodded in approval. "Not too shabby. Now the cat just needs a bath," She snickered. That was about a 4th cousin to a compliment, coming from Norrie. Generally if Jackson got himself all filthy - and he often seemed like he didn't even KNOW - Norrie'd yell at him to wash his ass before she got out the garden hose.

(My baby horse would be in my lap if he got out, and my old guy would run around happily on our property until he decided it was enough and start eating grass xD)

-

Axl, AKA Not A Kitty

-

"Good. It'll make the job much easier." He was already distracted thinking about exactly how many people he could fit in a person and if he had a hydraulic press would he have to still debone them. Obviously, the press could crush bones, so why go through the hassle of removing them? You wouldn't even have to dehead the person then. Or gut them, really, but it would be a lot more messy if you didn't.

.

Axl gave her a look before moving his attention to the next thing. "Correct. I am unburnt... right now." His lips twisted into a slight frown as he glanced at his shoulder... the not metal one. Horrible scarring, obviously burns, covered most of his arm, his shoulder, a little bit of his back, and that side of his neck. Technically, he wasn't the one that had started that fire, and it wasn't his fault that he got caught in the middle of it.

.

Axl shrugged and turned his attention to Norrie, snorting quietly. "Not too shabby. Thanks for the high praise." He responded slightly sarcastically, then scowled slightly, eyes narrowing a little. "I am not a cat. I barely have any cat in me whatsoever. Just the eyes." He huffed, wrinkling his nose slightly. "But I do need a shower. I don't think people will appreciate me any more with blood and grease smeared all over me." Axl commented with a slight snort. Personally, he didn't really mind, but it would be nice to feel clean-ish for once in his life. He flicked off another metal shaving and tilted his head slightly. "It looks almost like an abstract work of art." He mused.