Horse Eden Eventing Game
Horse Eden Eventing Game


Year: 192   Season: Winter   
$: 0
Forecast: Clear with Temps dropping into the Teens
Forecast:
Thu 11:30am  
Stables Online:  97 
Chatbox
Barbury Estates
11:15:54 Amelia
ISO an upgrade !!!! Please pm me!
Rancho Redondo
10:47:42 Trini
AUCTION. TB Rated Color Fillies and Mares 200 sb (for most of them lol)
-HEE Click-

TB Well Rated Color Studs and Upcoming Studs to Watch for Next Season!! 500 EBS No Breeding Reqs!!
-HEE Click-
The Lone Star
10:29:18 
WEE Wild RID stallion unbred. Asking 50k:
-HEE Click-
Minerva
10:28:16 Min
-HEE Click-
Four Peaks Ranch
10:02:11 Four
Cheap rated WBs in my Mare barn! Single E's and more, all under 800ebs
DaisyMeadowEventing
09:44:43 Daisy/ DM♡
Looking for a one or three month upgrade!
Nightingales Ridge
09:12:03 Issy
Yay thank you
Alpine Acres
09:10:54 Lily
Issy
one up in my shop :)
Nightingales Ridge
09:09:09 Issy
Anyone have detergent I can buy?

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.



Rules   Hide
You are in: Sales
View Main Chat
Quests
Horse Eden Eventing Game
Chatbox
Barbury Estates
11:15:54 Amelia
ISO an upgrade !!!! Please pm me!
Rancho Redondo
10:47:42 Trini
AUCTION. TB Rated Color Fillies and Mares 200 sb (for most of them lol)
-HEE Click-

TB Well Rated Color Studs and Upcoming Studs to Watch for Next Season!! 500 EBS No Breeding Reqs!!
-HEE Click-
The Lone Star
10:29:18 
WEE Wild RID stallion unbred. Asking 50k:
-HEE Click-
Minerva
10:28:16 Min
-HEE Click-
Four Peaks Ranch
10:02:11 Four
Cheap rated WBs in my Mare barn! Single E's and more, all under 800ebs
DaisyMeadowEventing
09:44:43 Daisy/ DM♡
Looking for a one or three month upgrade!
Nightingales Ridge
09:12:03 Issy
Yay thank you
Alpine Acres
09:10:54 Lily
Issy
one up in my shop :)
Nightingales Ridge
09:09:09 Issy
Anyone have detergent I can buy?

You must be a registered member for more
than 1 day before you can use our chatbox.






Refresh


Forums

→ Horse Eden is a fun game! Sign Up Now!

My Subscriptions
My Bookmarks
My Topics
Latest Topics
Following

Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

Not feeling good enough.. October 30, 2019 10:28 AM


Aspen Fire ES
 
Posts: 6362
#477768
Give Award
I started to feel like I wasn't good enough for anything about a week ago and I was afraid to tell anyone. My depression slowly creeping back into my life...before you say anything, no I'm not looking for attention, no I don't want to speak to a therapist, and no I'm not faking about how I really feel deep down...

I've never saw myself opening up to people face to face but when I'm around an animal, I start to feel accepted for once. Yes I have a loving family and yes I know that they will love & accept me for who I am but...I'm still haunted by the past until my aunt got me to open up more to her. I've opened up to her about the pain, the bullying, the harassment, the hits that I would get for no reason from other people from high school, and the close calls of my stupid decisions of almost losing my virginity that could've gotten me pregnant at 16 or 18 years old...

I had to burn bridges of people that have hurt me and used me...but the painful memories still haunt me til this day and I can still feel it everytime I close my eyes to fall asleep, hearing the voices telling me that "Your worth nothing" "You'll never amount up to anything!" "You'll never be good enough" "No wonder your dad left you because your a mistake!" "No one would love you because of how ugly you are"

My aunt would notice that everytime I'm around an animal, my eyes would light up and it was like I was a completely different person even with my baby girl (she's a calico cat) she makes everything feel okay, she's basically a best friend that I have grown up with and I would do anything for her but the fear of losing her....would honestly break me, even if it means putting her down so she couldn't be in pain anymore and as much as I would love to get back into riding and having my own horses... I'm afraid of living through the pain again from the past..

Anyways, I've finally got what I wanted out of my chest for a long time...thank you for reading & understanding this..

Edited at March 29, 2022 08:46 AM by Aspen Fire ES
Not feeling good enough.. November 1, 2019 12:29 AM


WarriorMaiden
 
Posts: 232
#478864
Give Award
*hugs* Depression is no joke. And honestly, it's okay to not want to see/talk to a therapist. Therapy doesn't always help. (Speaking from experience there...) You do what helps you. If you ever need a listening ear, feel free to message me. :)

Edited at November 1, 2019 12:29 AM by WarriorMaiden

Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
   1 

Refresh