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Going to keep this as short as possible. . When I received the crushing news about my father, I wanted to be left be. Like, left BE type be, to just play my games with him and not speak to anybody else verbally. . When I first got with this dude, I made it extensively clear that I am a selective mute, and if he can't deal with it, then I don't think he and I should be a thing. My silence means that I am okay, I said, I just wanted room to breathe and think. He said, you know. He'll work through it, and if not, then he'll learn to live with it. In his words, "you've got your flaws, and if it can't be fixed, then I need to understand that." . Kind of rude considering I've been working on this "flaw" in therapy for over 12 years... But... Meh? . Now... Back to my father. Again, that news made me distant. And I told my ex upfront, I can't tolerate a relationship right now, I can't tolerate cling, you've gotta relax and stop hovercrafting. . He has a history of WATCHING my every move and reloading my profiles to see what I'm up to, EVEN when it's on private. I spoke to him again and again, this is not okay, this isn't what you promised, knock it off. He didn't... He started asking my family and friends, then, where I was and where I was shopping, what I've been eating, etc. CREEPY. So I let him go, under the reason of incompatibility. I did NOT appreciate the "I'm hurting when you're gone" excuse. You think I'm not? . This dude had the guts to message my father (whom I do not even live with) and try a story of abusiveness from me to get me to talk to him again, through my ill father. I'm pissed. |
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I would consider getting a restraining order against him. He's doing the whole stalker thing and that is seriously not okay. |
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Hawkeye Farms said:
I would consider getting a restraining order against him. He's doing the whole stalker thing and that is seriously not okay.
I guess I hadn't thought about that, yet. Thank you for the idea, I will absolutely look into it. I've never gone through with something as such before, and didn't know online profile reloading could qualify in the list of reasons. |
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Yeah reloading the profiles may not fully qualify under the stalker laws, but contacting your family constantly, and showing up where you're at is def. stalker. Also considering he's trying to isolate you to him alone that's abusive to you. He's trying to control and isolate you. DO NOT let him do that to you. Also document everything he's doing. As I said a restraining order might be a good thing to persue with him. Once you have that if he shows up anywhere near you call the cops and they will arrest him. And I will say this if I knew you personally and we were RL friends if he started trying to track you down through me I'd pretty much tell him off, not to contact me again, and if he kept trying to contact me I'd sic the cops on him for harrassment. But then again I'd do that for any of my friends or family who end up in situations like this. I've been in them before as well, and well I can be intimading when I need to be, and my last ex who tried that with me freaked out when I was sharpening a blade then blooded it while giving him a very evil look. |
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Bright Sunshine with a few High Clouds
