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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Snark Factory
   1 

literally cant seem to have anything July 8, 2023 09:07 AM


Wings Of Glory
 
Posts: 2660
#1122325
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for context...i live with my boyfriend and his family. He has 5 siblings 3 are 12 and under one is 14 and one is 17. His parents also live here. We pay to live here...dont get me wrong we arent just living off of them we pay for our room, food, clothes, car, gas ect. and help with utilities for the whole house. I have a very different diet than they do. My boyfriend's family is hmong and they eat mostly boiled chicken and rice or pork, veggies and rice. I was not raised this way and cant really eat the same thing for every meal. Our solution was to just buy all of our own groceries. We dont really make a whole lot of money so what we buy is really important to us. However.....this has become a huge problem with them eating our food. They say well if you buy it then its for everyone but thats not how they see their food either...which is confusing. They get mad at us when we eat their food or use their meat or veggies but when it comes to our food suddenly it should be for everyone. Over this past couple weeks they have started eating EVERYTHING of ours. I had strep throat so i bought popsicles to help with the soreness. Went downstairs the next day(literally 1 day) all of them are gone. (mind you i bought 2 24 packs of popsicles) and even wrote my name on the box. They keep taking our meat and cooking it which annoys me because i have anemia and need to eat beef but they dont buy beef because they say its too expensive. So they are eating my beef just because they dont feel like buying it but they want to eat it. This is not just ground beef by the way....oh no cant be that simple...for my birthday i bought 2 dry aged tbone steaks 27 dollars each. I love to cook steaks and this was a little splurge because i wasnt getting any gifts. They cut them apart into tiny cubes and mixed it with vegetables and ate it *-* why? i have no idea. When i told them they said the same thing. If its in the fridge it should be for everyone. The thing is though i know that they know they didnt buy it. We shop at completely opposite grocery stores with different bags(have different words on them) and my food is always kept in the grocery bags in the fridge or freezer. They eat my vegetables, meat, frozen food, seafood, bread, milk, butter, everything.
The worst part is.. i do meal planning. All of our meals for the 2 weeks of our paychecks are planned out. We buy our groceries according to this meal plan which means when they eat something that i needed for meal planning it messes up the entire plan and now we cant afford to do the meal that they took the meat from and have to come up with some way to fix this. The kids eat alot..and i mean alot. I bought 3 loaves of wheat bread(the expensive kind that i like) for sandwhiches and toast for our meal plan. Within 3 days all of the bread was gone. We have even taken it as far as renovating our closet to be our pantry but this doesnt stop them from stealing our dairy, meat, and frozen items. Overall they have just within the past 2 weeks eaten over 200 dollars worth of our groceries and the only thing they dont eat is the healthy "weird" items i buy. aka salad and salad dressing. Just this morning the 3 youngest kids woke up at 5am just to watch youtube(at 20 volume) and ate my red beans and rice that i made last night for me and my boyfriend while we work at the barn today. This was not a small ammount it was 2 whole boxes of red beans and rice + 3 packs of andouille sausage which i already had to buy more sausage because last week they used it. Every time we are not home they go in our room and steal things from our pantry like ramen, raviolis, chips, drinks ect. we installed a lock on our door to prevent this but now they have a key to it because his parents complained about what would happen if we locked our key in there. Since then we havent really noticed any food moved but our door has been open sometimes even when we locked it. I grew up really really poor without alot of food and to buy food and have people steal it causes me a huge ammount of anxiety and panic attacks. We have talked to everyone about it but now the kids just lie and say "idk it wasnt me" "idk ask the other kids" "idk i wasnt in there" "idk i didnt eat anything" The worst part is even if the kids have eaten 3x+ per day they still eat when they are bored and they just feel like eating it. I caught the youngest brother sticking his hand into my cheese bag to put it on bread(my bread) with mayo(my mayo) and just eating it like that....? and one of the worst worst worst worst parts??? if they just asked me it wouldnt stress me out as much. Because i would know where the food is going. I also have very low vitamin d3 and have to eat salmon once a week to help with this(you can probably see where this is going) they cut the salmon up, skinned it, overcooked it, and put it into a bunch of veggies. Another thing is even when they cook with my food they dont even offer me any. They literally know im home and refuse to tell me that they even made dinner. But when i cook with my food they eat it without asking. Every time they go to the store the kids always tell them to buy them chips, soda, candy ect. and this is just weird to me?? because they always get what they want and if they dont they throw a fit and break things. Literally 4 days ago they were not supposed to be playing the playstation but were playing anyways without any of us home. They got mad at the game for loosing and ended up dragging the ps4 off the mantle of the fireplace and breaking it. Then when we got home they proceeded to say "the ps4 isnt working" None of us could find out why until THREE DAYS LATER when we found the HDMI port was shoved all the way into the ps4 and the whole backside was cracked apart. then they finally confessed and the 12 year old pointed to the youngest brother and said "it was him" they had no sympathy for breaking it and didnt understand why we were so mad we should just "buy a new one" This isnt the first time they have ruined my shit. I had over 800 dollars worth of leather and leatherworking tools and they got mad because i wouldnt let them use my paint and art supplies so they poured juice and water into the box where they were at(in the basement) and had the whole thing covered in black mold by the time i went to use it. I had to throw all of it away and cancel my 6 orders for custom horse tack from clients. They constantly think its "funny" to scare my cat and chase her and on one occassion i caught the youngest brother trying to hit her on the head in which i yelled at him and he cried. These kids are literally so spoiled rotten they cry when you tell them no and they scream when they dont get what they want. Mind you the youngest is 8 and has her own phone and social media(would not be my choice) but the parents refuse to see why this is bad. They have a dog which they dont take care of which i have started feeding, walking, taking to the vet, groomers, ect. and they still think they should get a doberman(good luck) the current dog they have is a beagle and they could not even train her to sit. within a week i had this dog doing sit, lie down, wait, heel, roll over, shake, high five, play dead, ect. so its really a lack of trying not a bad dog. Im just at my breaking point lately with them eating all my food and idk what to do i cant afford to move out and dont have enough credit for an apartment. Even if me and boyfriend put our money together we dont have enough:/ We live in a very big city and the only choice we have is a 1bd 1bth for 1000+ a month no utilities included and even then they dont accept cats. The thing that really makes me mad is just the entitlement and constant taking without asking and assuming its for them. When asked life questions they constantly reply with the most entitled answers i think ive ever heard. When we asked the oldest when he would get a job(hes 17) he said idk ill probably just live here and become a streamer until i get famous... like what?? no plan for the real world and no idea how to do anything. Every child in this house thinks they are going to become a famous youtuber without actually thinking about what to do with their life. 17yo has over 20k worth of gaming stuff that he has gotten from his parents. and the other day asked them when hes going to get his first car because he was wondering if it could be a tesla(*-*) mind you im literally 19 and dont have any car yet but my boyfriend did get a car for his 16th birthday which is still kind of wild to me with how i grew up. The 12yo boy said he wanted a horse i said no its a lot of responsibility and he said "ill just get my parents to buy it for me and do the work" When asked about any life challenge and how they would handle it they go back to "ill ask my parents" "my parents will buy it" ect. and this is just weird to me?? They constantly look down on me because im not hmong and even offer my boyfriend to date other girls that they know because they are hmong. Me and my boyfriend have been together 6 years now but every time they do this he says absoluetly not:) i just dont understand the point of asking. I really just want my own place but boyfriend doesnt want to move yet because he's scared and we dont know if we could afford to move:/
idk im just stressed lately by living here and i needed to rant to get this off my chest because idk what else to do but can someone tell me im not crazy for being annoyed or mad about this? i just dont know anymore and boyfriend is also at his breaking point which causes alot of tension on our relationship but we are very happy together its just this house that stresses us both out.
literally cant seem to have anything July 8, 2023 10:03 AM

Former Stable
 
Posts: 0
#1122330
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You're definitely not crazy. I'm now seventeen and still living with my 15 yo brother and parents. (My older sister got kicked out and is now 19) I grew up having my own siblings eat my food and using my things/taking them. Say my mother made pasta for dinner, and I put the rest of my serving in the fridge. The next day it would be gone. It was mkstly my sister, who also snuck out a lot, manipulated both me and my brother, threatened us, and bribed us, which resulted in me having severe anxiety and depression. Anyways back to the point. Last year I finally reached my breaking point with her using my makeup and taking my food, plus all the other stuff. I snitched on her to my parents, because I had tried to talk to her about it before and she wouldn't listen. The thing is, she would use all my stuff go in my bedroom, take my food, but then she wouldnt even let me borrow her shoes for 8th grade graduation. But when i told my parents, they wouldnt listen. One day i caught her taking my food and i was pissed. I finally screamed at her. Told her i hated her. Which was a bad idea, because she was depressed and suicidal. So yeah. She started crying and throwing hands, and then we got into a literally fight. And my parents werent home, so there was no to make us stop. We both came out of it with bruises, and i gave her a black eye. Only reason we stopped is bevause my brother has seizures caused by stress, and he was freaking out. You've been pretty reasonable compared to me. If you read this whole thing, i have a question. Could you move in with your parents or possibly a sibling? It could be pretty much the same but without all your boyfriends siblings. You could still buy your own food, clothes, pay rent, and all the same stuff as before. I dont know. Good luck!
literally cant seem to have anything July 8, 2023 10:45 AM


Eyrie of the Stars
 
Posts: 1025
#1122338
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Wings, could you get your own fridge/freezer and put a padlock on it? Your in-laws shouldn't be able to use the same argument against a lock, since there'd be no key to lose, and it'd be your property you're locking, not theirs. I know it's not anywhere close to your situation, but in my house we have a lot of hungry kids who often don't think before they take. I know it's been really helpful for my parents to have a separate fridge to store their own goodies in.
literally cant seem to have anything July 8, 2023 01:58 PM


Swirly's stable
 
Posts: 365
#1122360
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I feel you. My younger brother touches my stuff all the time too. Have you thought about moving to your parents house? I'm sure they would respect your stuff and everything.
literally cant seem to have anything July 8, 2023 02:13 PM


Wings Of Glory
 
Posts: 2660
#1122365
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My parents are divorced and live I separate states I don't want to live with my mom right now because her friend and her friends whole family lives with her and my dad's girlfriend hates me

Swirly's stable said:
I feel you. My younger brother touches my stuff all the time too. Have you thought about moving to your parents house? I'm sure they would respect your stuff and everything.


literally cant seem to have anything July 8, 2023 02:39 PM

Fairytale Paints
 
Posts: 796
#1122370
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I kind of dealt with the same thing with my mom. Me and my husband had to live with her for a short time while we bought our current home.
We paid her rent and half of the ultities. But groceries where always a problem. She'd honestly eat our food that we'd buy for ourselves. She'd say she replace it but never would. It was even worse when we had sweets or treats for ourselves. She'd eat them all and not replace any of it. Or if she'd went grocery shopping with me, we where supposed to "split the bill". But she'd always buy way more than needed, so our normal grocery bill would be double.
I agree. Best suggestion would be to get a mini fridge of your own. I had to go this in college as I had roommates that liked steal food.
Best wishes. <3

Edited at July 8, 2023 02:43 PM by Fairytale Paints
literally cant seem to have anything July 9, 2023 12:43 PM


Hawkeye Farms
 
Posts: 1232
#1122581
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I agree with the others on getting a mini fridge. I had to do that with my roommate to keep her from giving my baby carrots/carrot chips to her dogs that I got for my pets. Plus I have to hide a few snacks in my basement. She won't come down here unless I ask her to, or if I have to go out of town and she has to take care of my pets. But she also knows if she snoops I'll know about it.
literally cant seem to have anything July 9, 2023 02:06 PM


Bluebonnet Estates
 
Posts: 970
#1122602
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I agree with the mini fridge idea, you can also get locks for them, and you could purchase one with a cabinet like thing on the top of it, so you can store dry foods, and most I've seen have room on top so you can put stuff on it as decor and it could make it a bit more decorative. You could also potentially purchase 'decoy' food that it is unlikely they will like the taste of to deter them a bit.
I honestly feel horrible for you and I'm sorry you are in such a situation. If my future children ever were to feel sp entitled to do that they would get a swift ass paddle. I'm really sorry you have to go through that 😣
literally cant seem to have anything July 11, 2023 10:26 AM


Hawkeye Farms
 
Posts: 1232
#1123520
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As to the part of the kids trying to hurt your cat. Next time they do that in front of you, kick them in the ass and knock them to the ground. Normally I wouldn't say something like that, but if you hurt an innocent animal in front of me I go ballistic and jail time doesn't factor into my way of thinking.
literally cant seem to have anything September 27, 2023 09:50 PM


KPH Equestrian
 
Posts: 2267
#1143777
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My god that sounds awful. If they were my kids the 17yo would be handed an eviction notice for his 18th bday lmao. All the others have the crap beaten out of them for stealing food, breaking things, ruining your stuff, and everything else.
Padlock your food, if you pay for the room you sleep in, lock that too. If you can find a super cheap storage area nearby, rent one. Make it your own private studio or smth, idk. Argue that the food in the fridge/freezer is for EVERYONE, so why can't you eat what you need to?!?!
.
Oh and if you see the little brats mess with your cat again, give 'em a swift kick in the pants for me, will ya ;) I have no tolerance for that behavior whatsoever.
.
Also just an observation- if the kids eat when they're bored and don't do squat, they must be rather plump, no?

Edited at September 27, 2023 09:51 PM by KPH Equestrian

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