so i live in a very small town in portugal, which is 10 mins away froma bigger town, which has a riding centre where my horses are kept. For around 2 years now ive been riding and training with Joao, who is an amazing coach and such a nice, warm, lovely person who really helps me. BUt he lives in a big city thats a 45 minute drive away, and there he also has other studens and horses at a riding centre there. Where i am, he used to have a few more students, but they all left over time, so now its just me.

He's just rung up to tell me that hes going to have to stop coming to the town to teach, because he doesnt have the time to go between the two, or the money for gas. He said theres another trainer in town that could work out for me, but it wont be the same. He has offered to me that one of my horses (i have two at this moment who are ridden) go live in the city and i can go there every week to ride and train there, meaning i can have lessons with him too. But unfortunately i had to say no. I dont have a car, and the only way i could get there would be by bus which would still mean walking an hour and a half to the riding school, and besides that i want to have my own horse close to home. He said he can still come occasionally, but definitely not often. I will still be able to compete with him and my team, but its not the same. So now i just feel like theres nothing i can do about it. Ill have to start taking lessons with a new trainer, opening up a whole new unexpected chapter in my life when i was so happy and comfortable before. Just feeling sad.