Belle
02:07:24 
My boy coming 1st at his first show after out fall. Apart from me looking shell shocked its perfect xD -Click-
Dark Shadows Estate
01:56:51 Bazz
Sadly I don't think I'll have the 977k I need by RO but wishful thinking!!
Blue Diamond
01:44:19 Bluey
Goodnight, everyone!
Blue Diamond
01:41:49 Bluey
puck
none are on lol
FirstLightFarms
01:41:23 puck
Ohh that's a little trickier. But maybe a question for a mod
Blue Diamond
01:36:27 Bluey
puck
it was promised to me for free
FirstLightFarms
01:35:46 puck
If you prepaid, tell a mod. If you didn't, find a new artist 🤷‍♀️
Blue Diamond
01:26:09 Bluey
I messaged an artist about a pallate I was promised within 2 weeks, but I have PM'd them multiple times with no response
Twister Cove
12:51:27 
These two-
-HEE Click-

-HEE Click-
Twister Cove
12:48:54 
oop
Twister Cove
12:48:40 
-HEE Click-

I honestly need an opinion on this cause I don't know much. Lol
Blue Diamond
12:39:53 Bluey
i'm at 103 days
Cactus County Barn
12:23:26 Cactus
39 days away from a 100-day login streak!
Blue Diamond
11:45:23 Bluey
fern
you still here?
Blue Wolf Ranch
11:08:35 Targaryen / Blue
And I'm back. Resorted/organised my crystal collection. I have to start getting more into keeping raw, most of my collection is tumbles, carvings, towers and mini spheres. Got a couple jewellery and raw lol
Dawns~Souls
10:53:46 
I wish they had a mode where you can take a loan out on the bank lol cause I'm breaking here
RFS Thoroughbreds
10:49:47 Fern / 👹
ok
Blue Diamond
10:45:03 Bluey
gotta go bigback guys, be right back
Hyrule_Stables
10:42:08 CIA/The CIA/Burito..
Like a egg that has gone rotten... maybe a fresh one?
RFS Thoroughbreds
10:39:30 Fern / 👹
bad link
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Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:21 PM


RFS Thoroughbreds
 
Posts: 4396
#1288179
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Caden’s nightmare came crashing back with a sudden force, the coldness of Moscow enveloping him again, just like before. The snow started to fall heavier, faster, until it wasn’t just falling—it was crashing down on him. He could feel it piling up, smothering him, dragging him under with each freezing flake. The air was thick with the weight of it, suffocating, choking him as he struggled to breathe. His limbs felt heavy, the cold seeping through his skin, freezing him from the inside out.

“Isma!” he screamed, the sound lost in the howling wind. He tried to move, but the snow pulled him deeper, as if the earth itself was reaching out to swallow him whole. His legs buckled beneath him, sinking into the snow with no way to escape. He couldn’t see anything but the endless white, couldn’t hear anything but the deafening roar of the storm. He was trapped—lost.

The ground beneath him cracked, sending sharp, icy shards into his skin. He tried to claw his way out, but the snow kept dragging him down. Please… he begged silently, please, I don’t want this. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to be alone.

His breath came in ragged gasps as the weight of the snow crushed him, pinning him to the ground. His fingers scraped uselessly at the snow, his body trembling with the cold, the panic rising like a tidal wave. And then, he saw her—his mother—through the blur of snow, walking away from him. Her figure was distant, fading into the white abyss as if the storm itself was swallowing her up.

“No!” Caden’s voice was raw, breaking with desperation. “Hey, please! Don’t leave me!

But she didn’t hear him. She kept walking, her back turned to him, her form growing smaller, vanishing into the storm. He reached for her, his hand outstretched, but the snow closed in around him, dragging him down further. His vision blurred, his body numb from the cold. He was sinking deeper, the weight of it all—the guilt, the emptiness, the feeling of being unworthy—pressing in on him, suffocating him.

“Please,” he pleaded, his voice barely more than a whisper, his chest constricting with the weight of the words. “Please, I can’t lose you. Don’t leave me.”

But she was already gone, lost to the storm, lost to him.

The snow piled higher, filling his mouth, his lungs, drowning him in it. And for a moment, he felt the icy grip of disgrace—the deep, gnawing emptiness of everything he had done, everything he had failed to save. His mother, his past, the boy he used to be—gone, slipping through his fingers like the snow that buried him alive.

It was too much.

I’m sorry…” he whispered through the storm, his voice lost, his body giving in to the crushing cold. “I’m so sorry…”

And then, everything went still.

Caden’s eyes shot open, the room around him spinning in the aftermath of the nightmare. His breath came in jagged bursts, heart pounding in his chest as if the nightmare had leached into his waking reality. For a moment, it was as if the walls of his mansion, his carefully curated world of marble and glass, had closed in around him, suffocating him under their weight. But it wasn’t the house that felt like a prison—it was him. He was still trapped.

The remnants of the nightmare clung to him. Moscow. The snow. The suffocating cold. He could still feel it, creeping under his skin, dragging him back into the past. He was 20 now—too old for this, too old for the kind of nightmares that still left him shaking, gasping for breath in the dead of night.

His hands, slick with sweat, fumbled for the glass on the table in front of him. He hadn’t meant to drink so much tonight, but the bottle of whiskey had already been half-empty when the darkness closed in. It was easier, in some ways, to face the cold, empty spaces inside him when he was numb. Easier to drown out the memories with something strong. He grabbed the bottle, shaking his head as he poured more into the glass—his fingers trembling, but not from the cold.

The warmth of the liquor burned as it slid down his throat, but it did nothing to erase the icy grip of the nightmare. The feeling of being dragged under, the weight of his mother’s absence, the overwhelming sensation of not being enough, not even at 20 with everything he had. The mansion was too quiet. Too empty. The alcohol didn’t fill the void—it just kept it at bay for a little longer.

He leaned back against the couch, staring at the ceiling, trying to steady his breathing. His head was starting to swim from the whiskey, but he wasn’t going to let himself get that drunk. Not tonight. He’d learned the hard way not to let the numbness take over completely. The withdrawal after the hangovers wasn’t worth it. He could feel the sharp edges of the emptiness creeping in, but this time, he had to keep it together.

Not like last time, he thought bitterly. He gripped the glass harder, his knuckles white. The alcohol didn’t erase anything—it just kept him from feeling everything at once.

"Please," he muttered softly, wiping his face with his sleeve, the words raw and vulnerable in the quiet of the room. "I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep feeling this way."

But it wasn’t just the nightmare. It was the guilt. The regret. The memory of losing his mother, of never being able to save her, never being enough. He’d been 16 when she passed, and in the years since, his wealth, his success—it had only felt like a way to keep the world at arm’s length, to hide. The mansion, the cars, the private jets—none of it changed what he’d lost, and none of it stopped the nightmares.

As he sat there, still clutching the whiskey glass in one hand, Caden couldn’t shake the image of his mother’s fading figure in the snow, her back turned, walking away from him as the storm closed in. He tried to drown it out with another sip of whiskey, but the memory wouldn’t fade.

He stood abruptly, the glass nearly slipping from his fingers as he set it back on the table. What am I doing? He had everything—everything—and yet there was still this hole inside him, something so deep he didn’t know how to fill it. He walked to the window, staring out at the vast desert below, but the view that had once been so soothing now felt like a reminder of just how alone he really was.

It wasn’t the cold of Moscow anymore. It was the heat of the Arizona desert, but it felt just as empty. His eyes caught sight of the sleek sports cars parked in his garage, the luxury of his world, and for the first time, he didn’t feel proud. He just felt... disconnected.

“Why does it still hurt?” he whispered into the silence, his voice cracking in a way it never used to. At 20, he was supposed to have it all figured out. He had the money, the power, the freedom, but he was still that scared, powerless kid, just trying to survive the next day. Still running from the ghosts of his past, from the weight of the choices he had made. From the person he thought he was.

The silence of the mansion pressed in on him like a weight, the luxury, the wealth, the success, all so utterly meaningless in the face of the gnawing emptiness inside. He could feel his pulse in his throat, his hands trembling again as he dragged his fingers through his hair.

This wasn’t him. This wasn’t the life he was supposed to be living.

"Get it together, Caden," he muttered, rubbing his temples. Focus. He took another deep breath, willing himself to calm down. He had built this life. He had created this empire, and no matter how much it hurt, no matter how much he wanted to scream, he couldn’t just let it crumble.

His eyes flicked back to the whiskey, the bottle, the glass, and he knew—he knew—that no matter how much he drank, no matter how much he numbed himself, it wasn’t enough. It wouldn’t ever be enough.

“I need to stop running,” he whispered, barely able to hear the words over the thudding of his heart. But in his soul, he knew it was true.

And yet... even as the words left his mouth, Caden’s fingers lingered on the bottle. It was easier to run, he thought. It was easier to stay numb.

But as the night stretched on, and the silence filled the room, Caden couldn’t shake the feeling that this time—this time—he couldn’t keep running forever.

Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:32 PM


Blue Diamond
 
Posts: 6538
#1288182
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Rose came back inside a few hours later, the sun beginning to rise and her arm burning like someone had taken a blowtorch to it. She sighed and tossed the ball back into her car and walked inside. She saw Caden standing there. "Hey, you okay?" She asked, concern leaking into her voice as she walked over and placed a hand on his back. "Talk to me, love. What's wrong?" She asked softly, searching his deep eyes
Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:39 PM


RFS Thoroughbreds
 
Posts: 4396
#1288185
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Caden stood there, the weight of Rose’s concern pressing against him like an invisible force, pulling him back into the moment. His mind, still reeling from the nightmare, felt disoriented as her soft voice broke through the fog. She was asking about him, about him, the real him, and the walls he’d built up around himself began to tremble.

For a moment, he hesitated. He had never been good at this—at letting someone else see the raw, broken pieces inside him. It was easier to hide, to put up a front. But Rose had always seen through him, always managed to reach a part of him he thought he’d buried. And right now, in the quiet intensity of her eyes, he knew it was time to let it all out.

He ran a shaky hand through his hair, his heart still pounding from the nightmare. The image of Moscow—the snow, the bitter cold—was so fresh in his mind that it felt like he was still there, trapped in that memory.

“Rose…” His voice cracked slightly as he started. "There’s... there’s so much I’ve never told you. About my past. About where I came from."

He took a deep breath, the memories flooding back, and his voice grew quieter as he continued, "I didn’t grow up like this—" he gestured vaguely around at the expensive furniture, the luxury of the house. "I wasn’t born with any of this."

His eyes flickered briefly to the floor, his hands trembling as he spoke, trying to push down the weight of it all, but he knew he couldn’t. Not anymore.

“I grew up in Moscow,” he began, the words coming slow but steady. “Not a glamorous life. It was cold. Always cold. The winters… I hated them. But not as much as I hated what came with them. I was just a kid, but I had to grow up fast. My dad was gone before I could even remember him. Left when I was too young to understand, too young to know that I was already supposed to be angry at him. But I wasn’t—I didn’t even know what I was supposed to feel. And then it was just me and my mom.”

He paused, his throat tight. It wasn’t easy, talking about her—his mom. She had been everything to him. “My mom, Maria, she was... everything. She worked her ass off to make sure I had what I needed. She tried to shield me from the stuff that was going on around us, the violence, the danger. But the streets didn’t care. I got involved when I was twelve. Started running messages for the gangs. It wasn’t just a way to survive—it was a way to get by, to prove I could make something of myself. And I thought, as long as I was strong, as long as I could control things, I’d be fine."

His voice faltered, but he pressed on. "I got out of it for a while. I thought money would be my way out. I was fourteen when I started looking at the stock market, using whatever I could hustle up to place bets. Made my first real deal when I was sixteen, and it worked. Made me millions. By seventeen, I was in control of everything. Money, power… it all came easy after that. But it didn’t fix me. None of it did."

Caden’s breath hitched as the memory of his mother’s passing rushed over him like a flood. "And then when she got sick—when she was diagnosed with cancer—everything fell apart. All that money, all that power… none of it could stop what was happening to her. I thought I could fix it. I thought I could buy her a cure, buy her the time she needed. But I couldn’t. She... she passed when I was sixteen. I lost her, Rose. And no matter what I did, I couldn’t bring her back."

He looked up at her then, his eyes haunted, raw. "After that, it was just... everything spiraled. I built this life—this mansion, these cars, the company—but none of it is real, Rose. None of it fills the hole she left behind."

His voice dropped, barely above a whisper. "The past keeps catching up to me. The nightmares—of the streets, of losing her, of everything I’ve done—just don’t go away. I keep trying to outrun it. I keep trying to drown it out with... everything. But it never works. I’m still that scared kid in Moscow, thinking that if I just work harder, if I just fight harder, I can fix it. But I can’t. And I don’t know how to stop."

Caden’s words caught in his throat, his whole body trembling now. He felt the nightmare from earlier creeping back in, and before he could stop it, the sensation of cold, of snow, filled his chest again. He closed his eyes, fighting against it, but the memory was too real.

The snow fell hard and fast, blinding him as it piled on top of him. His body sank into the white, the weight of it pulling him down, suffocating him. The bitter cold wrapped around him, and he could feel his legs buckling under the weight of it. He couldn’t breathe. His chest tightened.

And then, he saw her again—his mother—her figure fading into the snowstorm. He called out to her, but the storm swallowed his voice. She kept walking, back turned to him, slipping farther away with every step.

“Mom, please!” he begged, his voice breaking, but it was too late. The snow kept falling, drowning him in the cold. She was gone. He couldn’t save her.

“I’m sorry...” His voice broke as the snow buried him alive. “I’m so sorry…”

And then he was back in the living room, gasping for air, his face wet with sweat, his heart pounding in his chest. His hands trembled uncontrollably, his eyes wide and unfocused as he came back to the present, to the warmth of the house and the steady rhythm of Rose’s breathing next to him.

"I... I can’t escape it,” he murmured, his voice low and strained. “I can’t outrun it."

Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:45 PM


Blue Diamond
 
Posts: 6538
#1288187
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Rose gently wrapped her arms around him. "I'm sorry that happened, love" She said quietly, softly. She stayed there, her concern still evident in her eyes. She knew he was still terrified, but she refused to leave him. She tried to think of something to say-anything-but nothing came to mind. She sighed, listening to his heartbeat as she processed his words. She couldn't believe he'd never told her how much pain he'd been through. "I wish I could help" She said quietly, really just breathed the words
Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:49 PM


RFS Thoroughbreds
 
Posts: 4396
#1288191
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"That's....that's the reason for the liquor,and all the medicene.Some weeks i'll go through a whole row of liquor and that same week two pill bottles." He says,swalloing hard and clenching his jaw.Caden looked down,hands loosely holding onto her arms as he did so. "I have billions of dollars,success,a good life,so why can't I just accept it?"
Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:50 PM


Blue Diamond
 
Posts: 6538
#1288193
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"Because that's not the way life works" She breathed, burying her face into his chest. "I love you" She said quietly, nearly silently
Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:53 PM


RFS Thoroughbreds
 
Posts: 4396
#1288195
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"Money doesn’t change you—it just makes you a more efficient version of who you already were.You think I like this life? I just know it’s the only one I’m good at." He mumbled in response,staring out the window at the desert,to Rose,at least.But to him?It was frozen tundra,his mother and Izma both walking away.

Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:56 PM


Blue Diamond
 
Posts: 6538
#1288198
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Rose just stood there. "Do you need anything?" She asked, letting him go and grabbing the liquor. She walked to the kitchen and put it away before going to get dressed for practice. She walked back down the stairs a few moments later, dressed and carrying her court shoes. "What will your coach think of us being gone nearly a month?"
Fern x Blue Diamond // January 28, 2025 11:58 PM


RFS Thoroughbreds
 
Posts: 4396
#1288201
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Caden's eyes widened and he got a thousand yard stare,face draining color as he sprinted upstairs,pulling on something for practice and scrambling to the door,barely managing a 'love you bye' to Rose as he left.
Fern x Blue Diamond // January 29, 2025 12:01 AM


Blue Diamond
 
Posts: 6538
#1288203
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"Love you too" She muttered, watching him dart around. She sighed and went to drive to the gym. Another practice of bombarding questions. The wierd part was how bothered Rose was by all of them. She didn't answer anyone, knowing that would only feed the fire and popularity of said fire.

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