General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

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"How sweet indeed. I'm doing you a great favor." Leo answered, then tilted his head, already intruiged. "Enlighten me." He questioned, taking a split second to wonder why he didn't just ask what it was. He wasn't an English Professor, in any way shape or form. "Well, you could've gotten stabbed as well, and I most likely would've survived another minute or so for you to actually determine whether it was safe or not. I did appreciate the concern, though." He smiled lightly, then paused. Weeeellll, she hadn't gone bolting off in the other direction yet, so that probably meant she enjoyed his company at least a little bit. Which befuddled him, as it was like the Laws of Physics- he couldn't be liked or cared about by anyone. It had always been that way, so why change now? Hence, the beffudlement. "Uhhhh- probably not? If nothing else, I am the perfect place to use your ginormous seemingly unending tank of insults, sooo.." He snorted quietly, then thought for a couple moments. Random thoughts, of course. Like how he never understood why young boys, even up until the ages of 16 or so, would show that they liked a girl using the same methods as they did to show they cared about one another. Heavy physical contact, like shoving, rude words, unhelpful and sarcastic comments- he never understood that. One of his earlier memories was being.. 10? Maybe? And watching a kid on the ranch heartily punch a girl on the shoulder, then insult her dress. Leo had always thought that so idiotic, even at a young age. All he could think was that most girl's minds functioned WAY differently and they would NOT appreciate being made fun of. They'd see it as bullying, honestly. He remembered his distinct thought being: 'Well, if I were her, I'd be EXTREMELY displeased right now.' With utter confusion written across his face. If it were him, he'd always try to look at it from their point of view. What would they enjoy? Things like that. As his mind snapped back from wherever it had been, he caught most of one of her sentences. He hoped he didn't miss too much, as his mind had really wandered off that time. Right now, he didn't really care- he was having a leisurely conversation, it was early, he had just eaten a light breakfast.. he could wander a bit. If he was in the middle of a fight, however, he wasn't going to be thinking about why gravity existed.

"Of course I have. Ever since being around you, I've been enlightened to new things, stabbed, exposed to a ton of new insults, and learned quite a bit about how to counter an opponent that is just as good as joking around as me. Of course I have learned ANYTHING is possible. Especially in the last couple of minutes." He replied with a small grin, then nodded vigorously. "I'd agree with both." He.. agreed, then chuckled lightly, looking amused. "I've had practice. Surprisingly, I've met many people who don't know how to talk right." Leo snorted, then continued. "Messed up enough times to be somewhat good at it and thinking it's absolutely amazing are about the same thing for you." He grinned. "It may be either. But as you said, as long as we're on the same level- wherever that may be." He smirked. He really didn't care how other people viewed him, and he did take what Glory Said as jokes- buttttt on the other hand, he had no idea how she viewed him. He didn't think she had almost ever said a serious thing in her life, before this conversation, possibly. He really couldn't tell. Even with Empathy powers, which he didn't.. use. Slightly unhelpful. He just thought it an invasion of privacy. "Yeah, kind of, considering you're the only entity in this universe that has somewhat similar of a vocabulary as me." He rolled his eyes. "Ha! Simara and Romanov are MORE than tired of me, and look where I am. Still here! They get pissed off, but they NEVER act on it." He grinned widely. "Also, I'm not quite sure about the you and Romanov thing. Praying he can't hear me, I'd say you have more skill, but he also is dead set on dying and not dying. It'd be impossible to kill him, cause he's like a zombie- he just keeps crawling onward." Leo huffed, a little bit annoyed at that. He wished the guy would not try and die every three seconds, but it was obviously impossible. "It is! I may have made up 50 of those verses, but I did it years ago- so it counts." He sniffed. "That's concerningly true, and I do not have a good answer to go along with it. I guess I'll have to stop poking the baby seals or start poking you. One or the other." He chuckled. "Yoi never let anyone down if they're expected to be let down. On the other hand, everyone is also easily impressed. It's a win win scenario, if you don't take into account my terrible self esteem." He chirped rather cheerily, a little.. too cheerily. Definitely fake, anyway. After resuming his rather dumbfounded state of mind, his eyebrows furrowed just slightly and he slowly glanced at her again. "Just put then out of commission, but too many is an understatement. I'm going to have to start fishing braincells out of the backup storage space." He complained lightly, though it just hid a sad attempt to recollect his thoughts. His gaze slowly trailed to the sky, where it froze for a couple seconds. "It's almost dinnertime (lunch)." He commented with a little bit of surprise. "I can make the trek into town. You hungry?" Leo asked almost immediately afterwards.

(woo, 735 words and I had to retype half of it x'D)

Lieutenant Dwyer

"Oh yes, a favor," Glory said sarcastically. She gave him a questioning look at his form of question, it wasn't really a Leo-esque way to ask, though he'd probably picked it up from her. "We-ell, I have this really fun game called "How Many Corrupted Can I Capture and Torture Before Getting my Ass Whooped". Pretty self-explanatory. But it's good practice for when we need information out of them. Totally not something you'd be interested in, is it?" Actually, Leo might not actually be as insane as her and might neither agree with nor approve of said game. The thought was slightly worrying, but she pushed it aside. Wasn't all that important anyway. "You absolutely would not have survived another minute," She huffed. "Besides, it was really only dangerous after the Corrupted made the mistake of stabbing you." A sly, almost dangerous grin spread across her face. "Not for me, at least." She'd been fully prepared to carry out her threats. Although, technically, Glory didn't make threats, she made promises, and she wasn't one to go back on her word. "'If anything else-?' You're so dense you make lead look light," She snorted. "While yes, my insults are infinite, I wouldn't call you the perfect place to use them. They lose their meaning if you get used to them. Annnd some of them are too vulgar for me to ever consider using them on you." Admittedly, she did have some pretty bad ones knocking around in her brain. Some that were bad enough that she wouldn't say them to another living - non-Corrupted - being. Definitely not to Leo, though chances were he'd either be shocked that even she was capable of such offensive slurs or just about die laughing. "Really, you're telling me that you've been alive how long and only just recently been stabbed?" She asked, then grinned proudly. "Well good, you're in for a shitload more." While he may wind up privy to most of her insults, he definitely wouldn't hear the worst unless he managed to get stabbed again. "The fuck would you even call a kitsune-selkie?" She muttered quietly. Selkune? Kitselk? Whatever. "As have I, though I do like to give people a hard time with my good ol' Scots insults." Now those she was proud of, and most were just flat-out funny. "Well sure, they're close enough," She said. "Geez, I hope I haven't gotten any dumber, then my creativity will stop creative-ing." Contrary to popular belief, Glory was capable of being serious, though honest was a better word. She wasn't one to lie just to avoid hurting someone's feelings, and was pretty brutally honest. "No no no, mine's definitely way more impressive," She said, smirking proudly. "Well that's a little different, since you just do stupid shit," She replied. "They definitely won't appreciate my shenanigans." Which was unfortunate, they were hilarious! "Aww, thanks," She said, genuinely appreciative of his praise. "I know we joked about immortality, but I think Romanov's actually got it figured out. We ought to use your poking sticks to get the secret out of him." Very bad idea, but good entertainment. She glanced around with mock nervousness and said, "Careful, while he does amble around half-dead a lot of the time, I don't think he'd appreciate you saying he crawls." One last glance around and, in a hushed voice, she said, "The walls have ears, you know." She snorted at his next words, admittedly unable to be serious for too long in these circumstances. "Does not count!" She huffed, then smirked rather mischievously. "Careful- I bite. Maybe cut the baby seals some slack." That actually wasn't a lie, since if cornered, she'd resort to any means available to her, whether that meant kicking a man while he's down - both figuratively and literally, throwing dirt in his eyes, or just poisoning him. "Definitely not a win-win scenario," She retorted. "Maybe I'll just have to remind you of how great you actually are." Definitely doable, though whether or not he'd actually believe her was troublesome. She grinned at his answer and said, "Well, at least they're not dead. Just try not to run out of backup braincells." It was, admittedly, more comfortable here with him than Glory would've thought. She looked back at him as he spoke, and thought for a moment before answering. "A little. You sure you can walk that far?" She asked.

(you guys are now writing a series of books a post. i'll be back on Thursday/Friday. sorry for being away so much.)

(Yeaaahhh I ain't writing that long of a post again xD. It took me 35 minutes!

Edit: 46 minutes later, I haw an 843 word post)

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General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

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As he earned a questioning look for his way of speaking, he snorted. "Hey, I can use weird words too! It ain't just a superpower you have." He scoffed. "Don't look so confused. It's hurting me." Leo added with a grumble in his voice. As she started to explain her game, his eyebrows shot up. "That... is one of the best ideas I've ever heard! I need to heal SO much faster so I can actually help!" He all but yelped. "Of course I have SIMILAR things, but mine usually just include how many I can kill- I don't really worry about the whole capturing part." He grinned widely. "So of COURSE I'm interested. As soon as I can walk without stabbing pain, count me in!" He chirped, already looking forward to something new. "I would've survived another minute." He retorted. "And you didn't even KNOW they stabbed me until you just somehow got a feeling, walked into the woods, and WALLA, there I was, bleeding." He huffed back, but did honestly think he was really glad he was on her side. Mostly, he guessed, as he was pretty sure he got insulted more and purposefully hurt-not-killed more than her than by anyone else. Huh. Weird thought. He wondered if she ever thought that about him. Pff, most likely not, considering 'he was so dense he made led look light'. "Well then why are you sticking around, my lack of bad reaction to your sweeter Insults?" He rolled his eyes. "Now you're telling me I'm not even good for that- ohhh the pain!" He groaned dramatically, somewhat because he just accidentally shifted wrong and pain was shooting through his leg and torso. "Too vulgar. NEVER have I heard that saying used on me." He mused. "Okay, nevedmind. I have been told many times that I am- or was, whichever- too vulgar." He added, frowning for a second. Hrmph. At least she wasn't trying to murder him with her words. (By the way, it's most likely die laughing.) "No, I just recently have been stabbed in the BACKYARD of the ONE place I thought was mildly safe, considering our whole purpose is to protect students and kill Corrupted!" He answered with a snort. "The amount of times I've been stabbed can be calculated with the same formula as you did my ego." He stated, then stared at her. "That's easy. A Kitkie." He grinned. For a Leo name, it sounded great. That wasn't setting the bar very high, though. "Orrrr you could just accept I may be getting smarter, then not have to worry about your creativity not creativitting!" He answered cheerily. "I said somewhat similar, not exactly alike. Need I get you a new pair of ears, madam? These do not seem to be ear-ing." He snorted. "I just do stupid shit NOW. You should've met me when I first joined. Let's just say we may be more alike than you're willing to admit, but I grew out of funny pranks and into defying death." Leo chuckled. "But you're right, they won't. They definitely didn't appreciate mine, so I'm guessing that creative mind of yours would take It to a whoole new level." He answered. "Yeah yeah- just like how insults get boring after being used too much, compliments do too. Don't expect a volley of them. And Romanov does NOT. He is EXTREMELY tough to make friends with because he's ALWAYS dying and he just suffers in pain for most of his life! He's too busy almost dying that he's never had a chance to live." He retorted. "And he does crawl. Or, drags himself along." He snorted. "Does too count. Totally counts." Leo shook his head, dead set on that one. "I believe you. And yet I'm still brave enough to be sitting here." He grinned, then frowned. "Yes a win-win scenario. Nothing else to it. No one is EVER disappointed in you and a lot of people are usually happy with the work you did." He stopped with a bark of laughter. "Miss Compliments Far and Few In Between remind years worth of mistreatment that he's GREAT?! If you want an impossible mission, go right ahead. I'd love to see you try. Just dont die in the process, though. I know killing a camp of Corrupted would be easier for you." He chuckled, obviously amused, and not taking her at ALL seriously. "Right. Don't run out of backup braincells. Great plan. STOP KILLING THEM THEN." He huffed indignantly. At the thought of food, he already knew that answer. "As sure as I am that bacon is the best food on earth. Let's go." He waited for her to get up so he didn't accidentally whack her as he was flailing to push himself up. That would probably be bad. He could already tell that it still hurt to ... think, so it would probably be the tiniest bit of a struggle actually standing.

(I hate when I do that- I always get stuck spelling one single word wrong, every, single, time xD. Gets annoying, eh?))

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General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

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"Did not. Accept it, I know some big words." He sniffed, then wondered if she REALLY thought he would disapprove. Did she know him at all? "Uh huh.. it IS fun." He agreed, then snorted quietly. "I guess that was.. kind of... unhelpful. Imagine if I would've died, though! The words that would've stuck with you FOREVER would have been Un Momento, Por Favor!" He grinned widely. Those wouldn't be the worst words ever to die after. He kind of hoped he could think up something much more John Wick (yes I'm referencing the present time, I don't care that we're loosely medieval.) like. OR if he just said 'Asta Lavista baby'. (Don't quote me on that spelling... me tired lol.) That would be SO AWESOME. Best last words ever. On that same note, 'I'll be back' wouldn't really work. For obvious reasons. "I don't walk faster than you, I just have longer strides. And right now, I hobble about as fast as a tortoise, so you are probably a wee bit faster." Leo snorted, then rolled his eyes. As she spoke five... words... he didn't know how the heck to explain them... he kind of just stared at her for a couple seconds. "Vas?!" He exclaimed, half trying not to laugh and half trying to figure out what the hell she just said. "Juuust in case you didn't catch that... I'll repeat it in English. What!?" He added with a shake of his head, snickering lightly. Of course. He was sitting near Glory, of course she'd say something like that. "Oh shuuuuush." He chuckled as she went on. "Torturing them for information sounds just pleasant. Why don't we make it a date- I'll bring roses." He rolled his eyes, the heavy sarcasm dripping off his voice. Possibly pouring. "Definitely impressive. And thank you, I'm glad you think I'm immortal." He snorted, obviously slightly amused. "Don't actually call it a kitkie, even I know that name just doesnt... name." He shook his head at his lack of words. He swore, sometimes he felt like he could spell Mississippi backwards in under three seconds, and sometimes he couldn't think up a single word. "I agree. I am getting much smarter. Considering I started out smart in the first place, this is a small leap." He smirked. "If we got in a dark humor battle, I think I'd win. My grief counselor died today, and he was so good, I don't even care... I'm pretty sure that single line describes my life, AND is a great joke." Leo grinned. "However, I do pride myself in my hidden storage of insults. You are rather vocal with yours, but that doesn't mean I don't have a couple up my sleeve." He chuckled. "Aww, are you worried I may have been better at you than something? Poor Glory's feeling threatened..." He teased lightly. "No, you'll never mature enough for that." Leo stated, fighting a smile. "Wait- OF COURSE you were the one to turn those frogs loose. I SWEAR I broke a RIB laughing. And you know those months it took to clean up? Think Romanov would get his hands dirty with anything but blood? Think Simara would stoop so low? No, I cleaned those up mostly by myself!" He laughed, easily remembering THAT incident. He honestly thought it was one of the students. Of course... of COURSE it had been Glory. (Gah, I keep spelling Glory Goory xD). "Good- I can be an AMAZING torture assistant. I prefer partner, but hey, I'll take what I can get." He grinned, though he was mentally thinking about how horrible he was at NOT giving compliments. Whether tiny, hidden, super obvious, or overused, he seemed to give too many, all the time. Even if used in a sarcastic way, he usually fished out true things, so even his jokes were sometimes compliments. So, his words were a TOTAL lie. She could probably expect many more to come. "I do have to say, it's not hard to find stuff to compliment. However much I hate admitting it, you are extraordinary at a lot of things that I wish I was better at." He commented, with a small huff. "I have! It is an impossible task! I've tried for a while now, even more so lately. I even went so far as to joke around with him, and all it got me was a glare and a Flip Off." Leo snorted. It totally counted, but she would never admit it, so there was no point in arguing. He was right, though. "And I'm teetering in whatever is after recklessness." He said cheerfully. "I'm disappointed EVERY day. That's not hard." He snorted. "Could NOT do both. I bet you could take down a whole camp, buuuuut you can't do the other thing." He answered with a scoff. Leo was still reluctant to accept help, from anyone, but he did accept her hand. His holy leg- okay, his leg with a hole in it- was just screaming in pain. It really didn't want to have weight put on it, but it had no choice. He stood up with ... lots of pain, little struggle, as he kept all the struggle inside. After he was up, he shifted his weight to his other leg, the non-holy one, and let go to roll his shoulders, which also hurt. "Determination is the key. Stupidity is the force to open the door." He commented as he started limping off, towards the road, then wheeled around and went right back. "Sometimes I hate my mind." He muttered grumpily, grabbing the guitar case, which he had put the guitar into, then rested it right inside one of the doors. It'd probably be fine. He'd only kill anyone that touched it. He then went back, limping at a pace that a snail probably would beat but maybe they'd get to the finish line at the same time.

(Yes, very annoying Dx I keep spelling Glory as Glroy xD Better than inslut though >>;)

Lieutenant Dwyer

"Oh please, I think the biggest word you knew a few weeks ago was 'spaghetti'," She retorted with a snort. "Exactly! I had to at least spare you the indignity of shitty last words," She said. "I'm pretty sure my last words will be something like; 'Go on, get out! Last words are for fools who haven’t said enough!'" Though, since she was Glory, her last words would probably be a stupid joke. "Yeah, so you walk faster than me," She replied, then frowned. "Are you saying I'm only slightly faster than a tortoise?" He may have been spared from a whacking earlier, but that might just do him in for one. She couldn't help but laugh at his reaction, and, trying to compose herself, she said, "Pooh-Bah is a character from some opera, where he holds numerous exalted offices like First Lord of the Treasury, Lord Chief Justice, Commander-in-Chief, Lord High Admiral, Archbishop, Lord Mayor and Lord High Everything Else. Now Poobah is basically a way to call someone pompous. There's a bit more to him, but you'd have to see the opera. Soooo... Grand Poobah of Upper Buttcrack is my utterly hilarious way to say someone is of low intellect, low personality, and can't touch anything without turning it into a mess but still thinks they're impressive." Not really applicable to Leo, but still funny. Plus, while Glory could string together a terrific slew of insults, she believed that the more words, the less meaning, so short, highly offensive insults were her favorites. She snorted at his sarcasm and said, "Actually, if you really want to impress me, you'll bring scots bluebells." She was only half sarcastic with that one, however, given that it'd be pretty difficult to get any. "Well, considering dying is the last thing you'll do, I've got no evidence to suggest otherwise," She said. "For all I know, you could very well be immortal." She gave him a look that said 'Don't test it, though.' "No, Selkune is way better," She lilted. She was pretty good at coming up with names, like the bird that made a nest in the porch of her childhood home, whom she called 'Wordibird' because of how much it squawked. "No you wouldn't. My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!” They soon stopped, though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals," She shot back. A little... not exactly saddening, nor pitiful, truth his joke must be for him. It just made her more mad at the world for turning a blind eye to those in need of help, especially children. And god knows Leo had a pretty fucked up childhood. "Oh, on that note- where does Napoleon hide his armies?" She asked. "Up his sleevies!" An old one, but it had its merits. "No, it's just that I'd've had to one-up you pretty much daily, and Simara would REALLY get tired of me," She retorted. "No I will not. Especially considering I probably won't make it past 35." Given her rather dangerous games with Corrupted, that wasn't a bad estimate. "Yup, that was me!" She said proudly, then laughed and blushed slightly at his misfortune- that Glory'd caused. "Oh god, whoops. I always wondered about whoever got stuck catching them all, I never realized it was you. I'd have had to re-capture them all, but I never got caught." She thought back for a moment on the planning of the froggery, and remembered something. "Oh shit, I'd made sure to catch only the quickest little frogs I could get just to make it more difficult." She put quite a bit of thought into that whole fiasco, and it turned out just as well as she'd hoped, if not better. "Well until you prove that, you get to be my assistant," She said, grinning. "We-ell, I could teach you... especially about frogging- there's an art to it." That being that you had to be quicker than them, but not step on them. And go out early in the morning when they were cold and slow. "Yeahhh, I don't think he knows what jokes are. Just glaring, invasions of privacy, and not quite dying," She said. Maybe he was like that on purpose, so if someone died he wouldn't be all that bothered. That's what Glory tried, at least, though was now for the first time failing miserably. "See, I don't want to be disappointed, at least with myself," She said, then grinned mischievously. "Is that a challenge? Five bucks says I CAN do both," She said, leaning against his weight slightly as he stood, slowly and painfully. She snorted at his words- he was right, for the most part. She waited as he put his guitar inside, then took up her place at his side, matching his pace, and said, "Lead the way, m'lady."

(Gilroy! Didn't know she had a secret twin brother 0-0. XD))

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General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

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"If you want to go that route, then Lopadotemachoselachogaleokranioleipsanodrimhypotrimmatosilphioparaomelitokatakechymenokichlepikossyphophattoperisteralektryonoptekephalliokigklopeleio-lagoiosiraiobaphetraganopterygon is the longest word I know. It's a dish with some fish and other meat." He retorted. Honestly, Leo spent so long saying the word he was- not joking in the slightest- a little out of breath after he was done. "Want to know how many letters? 173. Beat that, English Professor." He sniffed, then smiled mischeviously. "I do have to comment, the food was mighty good, and I'd get it again. Now, I am truly glad you did spare me that, but honestly... if I die before you, you HAVE to chisel 'Un Momento, Por Favor' on my tombstone. I'll be making people laugh even after my corpse has rotted away! Also, 'He said he was fine... he was wrong'." Leo grinned, chuckling at her idea of what her last words would be. "Nah, I think yours will go something along the line of apologizing for calling me an idiot so much even though you damn well knew I wasn't." He snickered. "No, not faster. Technically slower, as my feet move slower than yours while I'm walking." He corrected, afterwards letting out a small, choked laugh. "Umm.. maybe?" He answered with an evil expression, then honestly looked a little intruiged as she explained her colorful words. "Ohhhhh. That makes SO much sense. Because I would totally know a random character from an opera. Do you THINK I look like the kind of guy to sit on my ass all day and watch an opera?!" He snorted heavily. "Utterly hilarious. Totally the way I'd describe it. You see, the problem I've seen with society is that when you use fancy words and intricate meanings, they never understand you, which leads to nothing being funny. You're walking that road, Glory." Leo grinned. "On the bright side, could never be an insult to me. For one, everything I touch usually only gets ruined because it gets covered in blood, and for two, me ACTUALLY thinking and not just joking that I'm impressive is neeeever going to happen. I'm safe!" He said cheerily. He then cast a glare at her, rolling his eyes. "Okay, HOW was I supposed to know that? I can feel emotions, not read minds." He huffed, but somewhere deep down he made a mental note of that. Not that he'd be able to find them anywhere. Typically something thst specifically has Scots in the name would be found in... Scotland. Where they weren't. "Romanov is immortal. I am most likely not. Then again, the times I've almost died mirror's the amount of times you can cut a circle in half, sooo..." He trailed off on that one, a sly smile spreading across his face. Especially when he looked at her, and plainly saw her warning look. Just made him want to try it more. "Gosh, Glory, that's the oldest one in the BOOK. Everyone knows that one. Though I can't imagine ANYONE saying that to you without getting a Katana shoved in their voicebox." He chirped sweetly. A chuckle came out at her next words, but he had heard it as well. "I know, endless pranks just seem far too difficult to keep up for you. Tsk tsk." He shook his head in disappointment, his eyes twinkling. "Hey, I don't want to hear that. Shut your yapper and no more talk about you dying." He huffed. "I should've guessed it was you as soon as I saw the way you looked annoyed with Simara as she kept yapping on about Flash being late." He snorted. "Yeeeep. That was me. It was rather tedious, as every single one of those tiny durn frogs managed to get in the most inexplicable places. Even after I thought I was done, I was still finding them in sheets and behind curtains." Leo chuckled lightly. It really had taken months to find all those things. Dead or alive posters may or may not have been put up and immediately taken down with a glare or two. "Partner it is! And of course there's an art to frogging, it's catching frogs- however complicated you think it could be, it's ten times more so." He scoffed. "That's extremely accurate. I'm impressed. Especially the glaring. He has such a cold glare. When I manage to glare at something, it's way more fiery and angry, but he just looks disappointed in everyone all the time." He grinned slightly, then lifted an eyebrow. "Hehe. 20 bucks says you can't complete the not killing an entire camp one. I'd prefer if you didn't do that- you need to stay alive long enough for some more fishy fun." He offered. "Do we have a deal?" Leo smiled wryly. Afterwards, he started towards the road, snorting quietly at Glory. "I know that was a joke- don't even argue with that- but even with jokes, they have to be the slightest bit true, and what part about my personality, looks, or ANYTHING gave away that I'm secretly a woman in disguise?" He asked sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he quickened his pace. And tried to look less like he lost a leg. He had only been stabbed with a long pointy stick, AKA a spear, how bad could it be? Apparently bad enough to drag his leg like he was in a major war. The trek actually passed fairly quickly, as he was far more focused on other things, rather than his leg. It didn't help that he still couldn't breathe correctly- whatever had happened to his chest had not healed correctly, and that worried him in the slightest. He absolutely hated the feeling of not being able to breathe, so he prayed that he never got really out of breath.

(Maybe she does O.O nahhh xD)

Lieutenant Dywer

Glory just stared at him for a moment as he let out the longest string of syllables she'd heard at once before it clicked. "That doesn't count, it's from Aristophanes' Assemblywomen, it's a made-up word AND it's greek. It's just a fricassée with too many ingredients," She retorted. Maybe English Professor was more accurate than she thought. "Will do, though if I die first, I have two requests: first that my remains be spread over a town of your choosing, second being that I don't want to be cremated," She said, a sly grin on her face. "Actually, if I can be a little more specific, I'd like there to be confetti and my body to be cooked to medium-rare perfection, that way the onlookers get dinner and a show. No tombtone please, especially if it means acknowledging your not-idiot-ness for all eternity."(Actually my funeral plans) Morbid? Yes. Entertaining? Also yes. "That's not how that works," She sighed. "Regardless of how fast your feet move, if you walk at seven miles an hour and I walk at six, you're faster." That seemed pretty obvious, but apparently not. Or he was just trying to be bothersome. "You shitweasel!" She practically squeaked, slapping him playfully. "I don't know, you might," She said. "Not my fault you're uncultured," She sniffed. Though, admittedly, the only reason she knew of it was that she got kicked out of the theatre for - you guessed it - pestering the audience, all because she was bored and a large crowd was the perfect candidate for her mischief. "You might be safe from that, but you sure as hell aren't safe from me," She said. "You weren't, that's why I told you," She lilted, smiling almost innocently, as if she hadn't just called him a shitweasel. "Can't you only cut a circle in half once? Because after that, you're left with two half circles," She asked. English wasn't the only subject she was good at. "Damn, all that's true. Especially the katana, though with a bit of psychological trauma thrown in there," She replied. "That is not at all close to ANYTHING right. I'd beat you in that war, and then I'd be left with no rival- yet again." Orrr... she'd join forces with him and they would've both ended up on the recieving end of Simara's punishment. "Oh come on, it's an occupational hazard. Besides, it shouldn't matter all that much to you, I'm just your coworker, right?" She asked coyly. "Exactly as planned," She said, grinning proudly. "Every now and again I find a mummified frog in a corner, or under something." They were EVERYWHERE for a while, and it seemed a good amount were quite the explorers. "Alright then partner," She agreed. "Especially when you WANT the hard-to-catch ones." She nodded in agreement, saying, "Yeah, like he's just done with life. Or, un-life, I guess." Somehow, being half dead most of the time didn't sound all that appealing to Glory, but to each his own. "Hmm, 25 says I don't try to Corrupted thing, but I do the second," She bargained. "Umm, that?" She said, gesturing to all of him. Very much not true- if you look up 'masculine' in a dictionary, there was probably a picture of Leo.

(I'm in tears- I was eating while reading this, and I got to Glory's requests for what to do if she died first. I read the first line, thinking it was mildly normal, then read the second and spit my cereal everywhere xD. I almost choked to death in the process. Thanks for that lol

WHY MEDIUM RARE))

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General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

+++

"It does count, and just bask in the realization I knew such a 'made up' word even existed." He scoffed, looking offended. As he listened to her first request, he thought it far too normal for Glory, but of course the rest came. He almost choked on his own throat, as he hadn't REALLY been expecting THAT. With a bark of laughter and a shake of his head, he spoke. "Glory, there is something so terribly wrong with that statement I can't even begin to figure it out. That is my new favorite funeral plan EVER. No offense, but I almost want you to die first at this point- I wanna see that!" He grinned. "Medium rare it is." He obliged with an amused snort, staring at the ground for a moment and wondering why the hell he was like this And why he had Glory as a friend. Blame it on his parents, he guessed. "Even if I knew that-" the twinkle in his gaze suggested that he did- "I am still saying i walk slower, just cover more ground." He smirked, at this point just doing it to be annoying. As she exclaimed the rather perfect word and whacked him, he couldn't help but think.. [Ah, there it is. Knew I'd be getting whacked before the conversationv ended.] A grin Crossed his face, paired with a snicker at her squeaky voice. "Uncultered or just busy doing more important things with my life?" He inquired sweetly. "I've never been safe from you, and somehow, I'm still here. Whatever I'm doing is working." He chuckled. "Well good thing for that, I'll have to make a trip to Scotland someday to pick up flowers." He rolled his eyes sarcastically. "I'm not even going to begin on that one." He groaned, not wanting to brawl with her over what he meant. "Bit of Trauma would probably come with the whole stabby thing, but you could add in extra." Leo mused thoughtfully, then snorted. "Believe what you want to believe, Schatz." He lilted with an innocent smile. He then cast another glare and a scowl at her. "Just.. shhhh. You are a friend, at very least, which is more than a coworker, hence the not wanting you to die feeling." Leo huffed. "Oh, delightful. I must've captured hundreds of frogs, and there's still more. How pleasant." He stated drily. "Romanov is a special case- we can probably leave it at that." He commented, then nodded. "Deal. I'm pretty certain you can't, so this'll be an easy earned 25 bucks." He said, then snorted, poking at the ripped flannel on his shirt. "Quick question- have you ever seen a woman wearing this, and if so, I NEED to see a picture." He shook his head with amusement. As they entered the town, he paused. "Now you lead the way. There's really only one good place here to eat, and you've been there before, so go where you want to go."