General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

+++

"It does, doesn't it?" Leo mused. Then again, he had met a lot of people that didn't act like their name sounded. "Aw c'mon, you have to admit Jaws is one of the cutest things you've ever seen." He grinned, looking at the mouse sized ungulate. The fur was too long for its body, but super thick and fuzzy. It was a dark brown with black shadows and dainty little hooves. It had big brown light eyes, sparkling happily, and the cutest little nose. It's mouth was somehow completely normal sized, until it opened its mouth, revealing dozens of white pointy fangs that looked like they shouldn't be there. "Glory. I don't even know what to say." He groaned. "Take it as an insult! I'm trying here." He tried to sound indignant, but it was hard. "Mhm. Torturing gloves. Good rainy day activity." He snorted, shaking his head slightly. It reminded him too much of animals, and he was a big softie when it came to animals. Especially small adorable ones. Like Jaws. And Axl, but Axl was NOT small or adorable.... according to most people. Leo would probably easily say the killing machine was the cutest thing he'd ever seen. "A pillow fight? You will be scared to know I have a very firm pillow I like using for them." He grinned wickedly. "You're on. I can whoop you're butt and not get hurt. Win win!" He started mentally planning ways to switch his normal battle tactics to pillow fight tactics. "I need to get this bloody stuff off though." He cast a frown at all the bloodstained leather. "Really for nothing. It's not like the guy put up a fight. Almost would've been more fun. Let him believe he could win than smush him like a bug." He grumbled under his breath, already quickening his pace to his room, wanting to drop the stuff off. Thankfully, it did keep his flannel shirt and jeans clean. He had probably never been seen wearing anything but jeans or those Hawaiian shorts... save the kilt... they were just more comfortable. Though, even he knew he couldn't wear jeans swimming. He had tried many times, and they just NEVER dried out. He preferred it, though. He unbuckled the chaps without a second and dropped the four items, including his gloves, inside the door. He then returned to Glory, where ever she was.

Lieutenant Dwyer

Glory nodded in agreement, then snorted and said, "Other than you? Sure." Then almost immediately regretted it, and blushed slightly. Every now and again she spoke without thinking, often saying something unhinged to the wrong person, or... that. Whoops. Not like it was wrong, exactly. "I refuse," She said. "Try harder next time." She was pretty sure there wasn't a sentence conceivable that he could say to offend her, which was good for him otherwise he'd end up with a knife to his throat and several death threats growled at him. If he was anyone else, he would, at least. It was hard to be the slightest bit mad at him. "You'll be shaking in your boots to know that I've got one full of rocks just for this occasion," She retorted. Actually, she did have a rock-pillow, but it wasn't for pillow fights. Just an emergency bludgeon, since Glory was almost always over-prepared. Chronically Ready, she called it. She looked down at her own attire at his words, and was almost entirely free of blood, aside from a few spatters from when The Bone Collector 'collected' the Corrupted's arm. Unfortunately, he hadn't put up enough of a fight, thus the chainmail was unnecessary today. Just a side effect of being Chronically Ready. She made her way back to her room, unceremoniously dumping the chainmail on the floor in the corner, then practically giving herself a pat-down to find all her concealed weapons, as she often forgot just how many she had, and dropping them too on the floor, though kicking them under her desk, several hitting the wall with a metalling clink. She'd deal with those later, though the action made her look at the papers strewn over the desk, most of which had sketches of terrifying creatures in different poses on them. Concept art, basically, for her horrors, though some of the best were spontaneous. She glanced around her room and winced; it was sort of a mess. Balled-up papers on the floor, weapons shoved against walls with the rags she'd been cleaning them with, for some reason there was a throwing knife lodged firmly in the wall, and overall it was scattered with rather sharp tripping hazards. She sighed and tried to yank the knife out of the wall but to no avail. She must've thrown it pretty hard. She scowled at it and pulled on it again, but it didn't budge, and she frustratedly kicked the wall beneath it. Fine then, it could stay there for all she cared. She left her room, found Leo in the hallway, and asked, "Alright, where's our Colosseum?"

General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

+++

Leo blinked, and his mind thoroughly went out of commission for a couple seconds. It rebooted to process what she said, and he practically just did four double takes in a row. Was he SURE what he had heard? ...yeah, she had said that. 'Other than you?' Those were her exact words. His eye twitched, then he tilted his head a fraction of an inch. That definitely blew a braincell or two. "... you must've glitched, or my hearing is worse than I thought." He commented slowly, not sure whether to drop it, continue dying inside of 'AWWWWW', or show her his slightly egotistical side. "For the record, Jaws falls on the scale below you." He added with a slightly sly yet the tiniest bit waver-y smile. It quickly grew into an amused one as he saw her blush. "Now I'm sad you REGRET it, thanks." He teased, then let out a small sigh of disapproval. "I will. Don't worry." He scoffed, already trying to think up not so insulting insults. "I don't 'shake in my boots'. However, the POINT of a PILLOW FIGHT is no one gets hurt! NO ROCKS." He demanded, not wanting to have to deal with any more bruises. He was much more concerned about smashing her head in because he accidentally hit her too hard with a rock filled pillow. That's why they should use soft things. He got most of the way back to Glory before a knife wiggled its way down and almost sliced through his calf. He let out a small yelp and wiggled sideways, watching it clatter out onto the floor. "Damn it. Forgot that one." He growled, scooping it up and walking back, dropping it. He then made sure there wasn't any more, save his usual two or three that he always kept. He glanced around, wincing at all of the... sharp objects. His bed was practically the only safe place. Even that had a couple hidden ... ... things. He quickened his pace to go back, then slowed down when he neared Glory. He tilted his head, then snorted. "No idea, you decide. It was your idea." He answered, pushing a Rogue dagger a little farther down so it didn't fall out.

Lieutenant Dwyer

Glory bit her bottom lip nervously as he spoke and said, "Umm... both?" Actually, her mental word-checking wasn't functioning at 100% capacity and was partly to blame. Just thoughts escaping before she could round them up and stuff them down. His next words only made her blush more, and she wasn't exactly used to hearing anything remotely close to that, so she wasn't sure how to respond. Regaining some amount of composure, she said, "I don't NOW, I was just afraid you'd look at me like I'm crazy or stupid or both and make some dumb comment." That was what usually happened when she let someone accidentally see just how far from the line between sane and not she was. She snorted at his next words, knowing quite well he could never succeed in being offensive. "Not the way I do pillow fights- why call it a fight if there's no injury?" She said. She sort of collected scars, mainly as proof of her victories and reminders of her shortcomings. In the hallway, Glory thought for a moment before answering, "We-ell, my room's kind of a dumpster fire, and - forgive me - but I can't imagine yours is much better. We could 'borrow' some extra pillows and fight in the common room- I have a feeling some are gonna get ripped." Yeahhh, it'll totally look like a chicken massacre, feathers everywhere and a few pillows mysteriously disappearing.

General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

+++

Now Leo was fearing for her life, as she had NEVER looked like THAT. What the hell had she done to her own brain? That was, for once, NOT his fault. Except for, he guessed, his looks, apparently. Guess he had something to thank his family for. "Both. Of course. Are you going to be okay?" He waved a hand in front of her eyes teasingly, smirking slightly. That was just the outside, thought. A master of hiding emotion, he was mentally super confuzzled and freaking out and wondering if she actually meant it and a billion other things. "Well, I do look at you like you're crazy, cause you are. We've already went over that. We are both equally insane, what do you want, a participation trophy? Now, I may be the king of dumb comments, but do you REALLY think that I would look at you like you were stupid because you gave me a reverse insult? Pray tell, where did that notion come from?" He snorted, trying not to grin his way up into the sky. Well, that had definitely shoved him towards her goals- kill braincells and make him feel better about his sorry life. Both accomplished, just in far too small of magnitudes. "No no no, no injury necessary. What do you want to call it, a pillow fluffy pushing contest? We can see how hard the pillows can softly push someone over?" He asked with a scoff. "I'd prefer not to get permanently scarred by a PILLOW, thank you very much." He sniffed indignantly, wincing as he thought of adding more stories to his scars. Oh yes, this one right here, on my face, that's when Glory whacked me across the face with a pillow full of rocks. Mhm, I almost bled out. It was awesome. Gosh, he would NEVER want to share THAT story. Most of his others were at least interesting. The ones from his childhood were depressing. Some were awesome action stories, like when he got gored by a bull. THAT was a story fit for a bar. NOT getting smacked in the face by a pillow. "Mine isn't any better." He agreed with a shake of his head. "I think it'd be a great idea if someone was wandering around and saw two adults with the maturity of something not of this earth brawling it out with pillows filled with rocks, let's do that!" Leo said with a cheerfulness that could be very fake but also sounded very real. "Let's go steal some pillows then, eh? May be best if we take the extras from the unused rooms, then just use the ones in the common room." He suggested, ducking into what he knew was an empty room and snatching a couple pillows. So fluffy. So deadly. Maniacal laughter incoming...

(Took me 14 minutes, just saying xD)

Lieutenant Dwyer

Glory actually had to put some thought into answering that, and it took a moment before she finally said, "Have I ever been okay?" Truthfully, no. Not in a long time, at least. There may have been a time, long, long ago, that she was, although such a time was long forgotten. "No participation trophies, please, lest they end up as kindling," She retorted, "I dunno, you might've." Glory was a professional worrier, with more experience at worrying than anyone else she knew, so of course every possibility ran through her mind. "No, that's a... mediocre name," She said. "How about a pillow whooping war?" It was an improvement, implying a good whacking without deadly weaponry. "Oh come on, it gives you proof you actually lost a pillow fight against me!" She said, grinning. "Or maybe that's why you DON'T want to use rocks," She added. Definitely wouldn't make a cool story - imagine telling people you got hit in the face with a pillowcase stuffed with rocks by a woman half your size. Pitiful at best. "Hey, I'm not from this earth, so it's fine," She said. Really, she enjoyed more childish activities such as pillow fights because it felt like she was making up for the childhood she never got, maturity be damned. "That works," She agreed as he robbed a vacant room of its pillows. Nobody'd miss them, aside from maybe the ghosts. "Perfect," She said, grinning, and led Leo to the common room. She quickly surveyed the soon-to-be battlefield, taking note of a couple of couches, armchairs, and end tables. Perfect cover, though the couch cushions were probably off-limits, as the pillows they already had were likely going to be destroyed. The rug may be able to be yanked out from under one's feet, though a head injury was sure to follow. Definitely no rug-pulling. She walked over to one of the tables, and gently lifted Jaws off her shoulder, setting him on the table and scratching him one more time. Turning to Leo, she took one of the pillows from him, shifting it in her hand for a moment, trying to find the ideal grip. Clutched by the middle like a shield, or by a corner for maximum range? She settled for range, though maybe a couch cushion would wind up being used as a shield. "Alright then, ready?" She asked, raising the pillow and adjusting her stance. She'd be nice and let him take the first swing, since she was fairly confident that she'd win in the end.

(Oh hush, I leave HEE open while I do other stuff IRL lol)

(What have i missed today? you guys have written about 50 books O.o)

General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

+++

"I didn't mean- oh nevermind. It was a stupid question." Leo sighed. He should've known he wasn't going to get an answer out of that one. "I could always use more kindling, why don't you get me a few?" He grinned, then shook his head. "Nope. If you're going to worry, worry in a more logical way. Think of the worst-case scenario, the best case scenario, and the most likely scenario. Then worry about the most likely one, if you have to." He pointed out with a chuckle. He worried about far too many things as well, so he really shouldn't be the one talking, but he was trying to fix his worrying problem as well. "I wasn't trying to come up with a beautiful name, Einstein." Leo rolled his eyes with a small huff. "A pillow whooping war works just fine." He answered, then lifted an eyebrow. "Hey Glory, think of what I told you. Don't focus on the best case scenario, either." He snickered. "I do agree there is a slight disadvantage for poor you, but that'll only make your struggle to win more fun." He smirked, not answering the rock one. Pretty correct, he didn't want to have his face split open by a shortstack with a bag of boulders. "I am from this earth and it's still fine, so we don't have to worry about that. Then again, I'm a bit.. not average." Leo grinned, following her to their battlefield and handing her a pillow. He glanced around quickly, ideas filling up his mind. "Two questions- any rules, and how do you know when you've won? When the other person gives up? Cause we both know neither of us will ever just give up." He inquired with a snort, looking at the pillow he had, finding the best place to hold it from, and grabbing on. The corner, obvious, for more range, as they were pillows- he could be hit as hard as he wanted and there still probably wouldn't be any major issues. He went to stand on the other side of the table, an adequate starting point, and adjusted his grip on the pillow... before deciding it wasn't good enough. He shoved the soft pillow down into the pillowcase, then grabbed the excess and wrapped it around his hand. Perfect. That sucker ain't comin off.

('shortstack with a bag of boulders' xD

Aussie- Glory and Leo tortured and killed a random Corrupted, and are now having a pillow fight. Good opportunity for Flash to come and wallop them both ;3)

Lieutenant Dwyer

"Hey, the question itself wasn't stupid," Glory said, "It's just that I have no clue. 50/50 chance of being okay or not, I think." Key words being 'I think', there was no way of knowing, especially since everyone had their own idea of okay. "That's all you're going to get," She said with a snort. Now she REALLY had to win, if she hadn't before. "I can't just flip a switch and decide that I won't worry." She said. Simply not going to happen. "Nope, because we both know you won't succeed," She teased. Although... 'Badass Bass' was one hell of a name, for a fish at least. "Oh wheesht why don't you," She huffed. That was somewhere between best and most likely, so she was perfectly justified in expecting to beat him. "'Poor me' my ass, you underestimate my pillow skills," Glory retorted. She could use almost anything as a weapon if need be, a pillow was no different. Rocks, shovels, sticks, ladles, boots, the list goes on. "Above average, I hope, or this'll be too easy," She said with a smirk. She looked down at the floor- there was a large circular rug right in the middle of the room. She pushed the table off to one side against the wall, then stood on the side of the rug opposite Leo. "Don't step off the rug, and you automatically lose if you obliterate your pillow," She answered. That was pretty much all the rules necessary since she was certain he wouldn't resort to any dirty tactics. No body slamming, shoving, etc. She glanced at his grip on the pillow and realized that there was no way she'd be able to disarm him. Shit. "Okay, ready?" She started, "Set," She widened her stance, lowering her center of gravity, "GO!" She lunged at him, slipping around behind him, and whacked him over the back of the head. Beautiful maneuver, though it left her slightly off-balance. She used the forward momentum to make a full loop around him, winding up in roughly the same spot as before.

(His insults are mild for Glory, so you ain't seen nothing xD

Yeah, that's about right. And noooo, Leo doesn't need MORE people against him!)

-

General Anubis

AKA: Craptain Jack Spare-Ribs

+++

Leo snorted at her comment, shaking his head slightly. He was still a little flabbergasted, but he was sucking it up to prepare for the fight. No, brawl. No... none of the words fit. Duel. Yeah, pillow duel. "You can too. It's your own mind, you're in control of it." He smirked, then let out a laugh. A rather maniacal one. "In your dreams, maybe." He chirped, chuckling lowly. He had a couple ideas up his sleeve, but a lot of them were more for a real fight, and would not make sense here. He was disappointed that breathing was still a bit of a problem, but he wasn't going to get his injuries hold him back. Not that this was a super important duel. "Well of course I meant above average, with how you explain my ego, you should be expecting me to believe I'm God." He scoffed, making sure his feet were all the way on the rug and glancing around. At least it'd provide adequate grip. "Wait, I lose if my pillow dies? How am I supposed to hit you!?" He groaned, wondering how much force he could put into it with the pillow exploding. At her go, he let her make the first move, unbothered by the rather light whack. He then shot forward, judging how big the carpet was. He rolled forward, shooting up and slamming the pillow into her stomach with enough force to knock her over backwards. He stopped his own momentum from going off by twisting around in an intricate spin, balancing the pillow and his weight as he stopped back where he had been, then launched another attack immediately afterward. Fienting to the left, then swinging the pillow right, into her shoulder/neck area, not engaging his power but using almost every arm muscle he had to slam the pillow into her head. He easily kept his balance as he bounced back, in a defensive position immediately.