Aussie Stables
03:04:21 Aussie - Golden
my showers made me 1k
i wanna cry lol
Aussie Stables
03:01:43 Aussie - Golden
Prezi!
Boulder Creek
02:40:26 
I enjoy my weekly read of Post Secret.
Sometimes holding a stranger's secret feels liberating - especially when you say it's okay.
Maybe some one out there thinks my secrets and struggles are okay - or at least the knowledge that you're not alone
Arcturus Centre
02:21:50 Prezi
grimmmmm

I wanna pretzel too ugh
Tequila
01:55:12 Tee | Quila
I wanna a pretzel
NS Arabians
01:18:48 Koko
Was not expecting this when i threw my boy to some PEP broods for some fun

-HEE Click-
Wicca Wilds
01:12:21 Grimm(us)
Prezilicious~
Arcturus Centre
01:10:16 Prezi
Ooh 👀
Dutch Manors
01:04:51 July/Dutch/ace
pera, PM me ^^
White Wolf Stables
01:04:22 WWolf
Thank you guys! He was definitely a good boy in my opinion- just hoping he produces the way I expect him to
Ponies heaven
01:03:50 Pera/ peral
Preferably manip but I donÂ’t mind drawings of my OC!
Dutch Manors
01:02:40 July/Dutch/ace
art
Ponies heaven
01:02:27 Pera/ peral
Dutch
What do you mean? Like stable set or the type of art?
Dutch Manors
01:01:43 July/Dutch/ace
pera, what type?
Ponies heaven
12:58:46 Pera/ peral
*sigh* I want a art piece to match my palette..
Ponies heaven
12:56:29 Pera/ peral
Ooh! Wwolf!
ThatÂ’s a handsome colt ya have there!
The Joker
12:56:22 Ari <3
Oh he's cute!
White Wolf Stables
12:55:13 WWolf
-HEE Click-
I am so anxious for RO dying to try this boy out
The Joker
12:52:08 Ari <3
Silent
Definitely sounds worth it, yeah :)

Hawk
I'm hopeful that my colt will finally level lol
Dutch Manors
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Forums > Rider's Lounge > Writer's Nook
  1

   Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 07:25 PM

Rivendell Steeds
 
Posts: 1194
#980572
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Okay, so I got bored a few weeks ago, and decided to start writing a novel in my boredom. I've -technically- written a first chapter, besides this short introduction, but I honestly think I lost my imagination for it. I won't be posting that here (yet), however, here is the introduction. Let me know what you think!

I'm basically going to treat this forum as a wiki for this novel, and a place for suggestions on it. If you have any name ideas, let me know!

Pronuciation help:
Yilyviad - (Yee-Leh-vee-add)
Leolwin - (Lee-OH-L-w-ih-n)
Plyth - (Pl-eye-th)
Mythius - (M-ih-th-EE-us)
Ryenni - (R-ee-eh-nee)
Zykria - (Z-ih-cr-ee-a)
Octrey - (Awe-c-tree)


- Introduction -
The roaring winds sweep past as we go. The fearsome cries of the nearby fractures surround the cove. As the waves crash against the rough edges of the cliffs, so do the other riders. It’s just us. Us, against the swarms of the hideous beasts we call fractures. It always makes me sad to think these creatures were once leolwins.

A long time ago, we elves weren’t the only life-bringing creatures in Yilyviad, there were also leolwins. These magical beasts were giant, and beautiful. With wings like dragons, and the body of a canine, they ruled fairly over all other creatures. We lived in harmony with these creatures, but in the end, it was us who destroyed them.

Throughout history, elves were known to be fearsome warriors, and great allies, but that all changed when the plyths came along. The plyths were a form of corrupted elves that had been tortured and left for dead. Their hatred for our kind grew so much that they would cut their own ears off to not look like us. Soon enough, they sought to destroy the thing we valued above all.

On the day we call “The Accident to Change it All”, my youngest brother Mythius let in a plyth child. She told him her name was Ryenni, and that her ears had been injured in an encounter with a griffin. He led her directly to the heart of Zykria, looking to get her into a temporary home. It was then when she made her move. Using a concealed staff, she knocked out Mythius, and set a beacon for the plyth warriors to teleport to.

One by one, the leolwins were infected by the spells used on them, and all but a few were turned into ravengeous monsters. Many surviving leolwins fled to the upper regions of Octrey, to live in hiding. The rest coincide with us elves, helping fight against the plyths. Some are used as mounts in battles, others as decoys.

Extra Info:
Setting - This story takes place in 3026, in the far future. Humanity resorted to war, and ended up destroying most of Earth in WWIV. The elves stayed in hiding throughout the reign of the humans, but emerged to end the destruction and violence they caused. Most of humanity has died off, and all that remains of the humans are the half-elves; the result of the cross-breeding of humans and elves. Since the elves came into power in 2079, all magical creatures were able to return to thrive on Earth.

Inspirations - Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The Unwanteds, Nier: Automata, and many, many more fantasy/equine novels.

Things to Note - This is a WIP. Not the finished, or even halfway done product. Also, this isn't a fanfic. Ideas may have aspects that other novels share, like magic, mythical beasts, etc. but no main ideas are ripped off/stolen.

What do you think I should add to this novel? Should I continue writing it? Feedback is well appreciated!

Edited at April 15, 2022 07:30 PM by Rivendell Steeds
Fantasy Novel - Need Feedback! - WIP April 15, 2022 09:26 PM

FirstLightFarms
Trivia Team
 
Posts: 3334
#980598
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Very cool concept! I'd be intrigued in where you go with it :)

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