ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

"Wow, you've learned quick," Glory mused, genuinely a little impressed. Nobody else spoke Glory-Speak even half as well as he did. Well, nobody stuck around long enough to be able to learn it, but that wasn't important.

"If a handsome yet not as handsome as you obviously man offered to buy me a drink, I'd accept, throw it at him, and set him on fire with the alcohol he paid for," Glory said with a snort. Now that she thought about it, a good number of guys had offered to buy her a drink, and every single one of them was firmly turned down. Depending on their demeanor, some were more forceful than others. The good ones knew when to quit and left Glory alone. "That's true. I did do that, too," She said, wrinkling her nose. "Nope, point taken." Okay, sure, Glory'd never act human. Thanks.

"Yours don't," She snorted, "Back on my planet they do." Sure they did, concrete regenerated itself. Duh. And you could walk on rainbows and eat clouds. And owls ate computer mice, birds ate gummy worms, everyone's a pony, and poops butterflies.

"Okay, maybe not a spineless ass kisser, but definitely a spined Glory kisser," Glory mused.

"So the limp may or may not be permanent, you're just permanently injured," Glory snorted. Sounds about right. But if you never heal, how are you supposed to know if the limp is permanent, and not just the injury? "Unless you get sent to the funny-farm," She countered, which was pretty likely for both of them.

-

"Are you saying I DON'T do anything with mine?" Glory asked with a huff. Most people really didn't though, so it was a good thing Glory wasn't most people. Or a people at all.

"Oh good, because I'd think you to be quite the idiot," She said. She may ACT like she did sometimes, or SAY she did, but really she did not. He was one of the few people who didn't bother Glory with ignorance.

"Uh-huh. I think you just have a furry fetish," She teased. "I can blame you, because I so choose to." That was really the only reason- Lucy was adorable.

"Is not depressing," She grumbled, "nor is it all I do."

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

"I imagine, I've never been easy to communicate with," Glory said with a snort. It was painfully true, since half the time she was too bored with whatever she'd been subject to to bother with listening.

"Once," She admitted, "He was drunk and getting too handsy for my liking - which is at all - so he got turned into a charred bastard." It was honestly beautiful. He ran outside screaming, and in the dark evening, he looked like a brightly burning star had fallen from the sky. The effect was muddled a bit, however, but his screams and swears. If he had just shut the fuck up and let Glory appreciate the living bonfire she'd created, it'd have been much appreciated.

"Eh, buildings not growing back is worth it to be on the same planet as you," She said. Who gave a shit about buildings, anyway? Only a wimp won't sleep outside.

"I do know, and I also know that that certain someone doesn't think you do it often enough," Glory said, giving him sad puppy-dog eyes. Yes, those had been two incredibly different things. That was just how Glory-Speak worked.

"I'll make sure to kill all the legged ones, then," She chuckled. Y'know, because there would just be legless people coming to collect Leo.

-

"Yeah, it would be. I'm glad you see that," She said with a snort. His innocent smile was generally the clearest sign that he was in fact not innocent, and knew damn well what he was doing. "Well when have you ever known me to be considerate?" Glory countered, "Besides, you've already established that you have a sock fetish." Or, rather, he'd worded something poorly, Glory teased him for it, he was embarrassed and utterly unimpressed with her, and Glory proved her asshattery. "Hey, there's a difference between a genuine apology, an I'm sorry you feel that way, and an overly dramatic apology that makes me think you're just being a suckup," She said, the second one said in a high-pitched, annoying, mocking voice. Being told 'I'm sorry you feel that way' was honestly worse than someone just refusing to apologize. "Mhm, right," She muttered. "Did you decide whether we were leaving today?" Glory asked after a moment. It'd probably be best. They both needed their wounds properly treated, and Glory was a little nervous that her broken hand and ribs would heal all funky and breathing would forever hurt and her left hand would be more useless than useful.

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

"Easier now doesn't make me any less of a pain in the ass, though," Glory said, amused. She was a pain mostly just because she could. And because she was predisposed to become a grouchy old lady, given her permanent 'fuck you and the horse you rode in on' attitude. And the fact she relished in the suffering of others. Watching some whoremaster roast alive, his skin charring and bubbling and fucking MELTING off his very bones, brought Glory a very malicious, primitive pleasure that Vlad the Impaler would shy away from her out of fear.

"Oh it was amazing. Definitely gotta try it sometime. I did get permanently banned from that bar though, so it's definitely a trick to try only on the bad side of town," She said, frowning a little at the end. That had been the only real downfall of that night; the bartender, pale as a ghost and shaking like a leaf, had come outside to try to tell Glory that she wasn't allowed back inside the establishment. That had been a little sad, but so, so worth it. (That is a very fair excuse, plus, only pretentious snobs actually pronounce it marshmAllow, like a fucking goober, and marshmallow makes more sense)

"I think I am," She said, grinning proudly, "Maybe I will learn to act human, after all." Not a fuckin chance.

(Gotta say. I haven't seen the new Puss in Boots, so I had to look it up, and wtf xD he's cuuute) "Oh it's just awful! I think this certain someone might've said something, but too vaguely apparently," She whined with the dramatic flair of Shakespeare himself. She forced herself into a slightly more upright and less glob-of-jellyish position to make Leo's oh-so-difficult task a little easier, grinning happily.

"Well it's either that or I cheer them on, your choice," Glory snickered.

-

"Mm, definitely not when eating. You will get growled at, I will refuse to listen to anything, and you will possibly lose some appendages," She mused. She tended to be rather wolf-like; one does not bother Glory during the rare meal, and one certainly does not ask to try some. If one does, one is pretty much guaranteed certain death. "Yes we have," She argued. "You called my stupid penguin socks beautiful, said I don't need to wear anything else, and when I teased you for it, you said I have a sock fetish like no other," She reminded him, doing a horrible yet hilarious impression of him.

Glory tried her damned hardest not to laugh as he ranted about idiot people, but it got harder and harder as he went on, her shoulders shaking as she silent-laughed in the way one does when trying to be quiet or not laugh at all. "Fucking hell, can you not be funny for 10 minutes," She muttered, trying not to choke on air.

"Fine, you're usually not a suck-up," Glory said, having recovered from what felt like certain death via laughter and punctured lungs.

"It came to you when you outranked me," She snorted. That was her excuse, anyway. It was his turn to be the cunning one. "Sounds like a good idea. I think the dog knows the way back." The heat-seeking missile would be able to lead them back, no problem. She'd probably run there and back several times waiting for Glory and Leo to catch up.

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

"Well shit, I ain't supposed to be easy to deal with," Glory said a little dejectedly. She was supposed to be as problematic as possible, everywhere, all the time, and if her pain in the ass-ness was even slightly easier to deal with, she'd failed.

Glory nodded in agreement. "It works best if the guy's a smoker- you can make it look like he spilled his drink on himself and tried to light a cigarette," She said. It was a perfect cover, but only worked if the guy was drunk. That was the key- you had to find a drunk smoker who doesn't understand what 'no' means.

Glory snorted and said, "I'm already doomed, a little more dooming won't hurt." She was a terrible role model too. "I think you're half alien, which is why you're better at acting human than me," She suggested. That made sense, at least. More than could be said for some of her other ideas. (lmfao I might have to watch it xD)

"You should feel very bad for this certain someone. This level of neglect is such a horrible, terrible, unspeakable crime, and this certain someone did nothing to deserve it," Glory said, with the same intonation as those commercials begging for money for sick children.

-

"Hmm... then I might be in an amicable enough mood to be considerate," Glory said after some consideration. THEN she might not be so horrible and murderous.

"But you DID say those words they are PERMANENTLY BURNED INTO MY BRAIN with how utterly OUT OF POCKET and HILARIOUS they were," Glory huffed. (lmao I tried too and failed xD Also, if you read back, Leo did in fact say "I HAVE A SOCK FETISH LIKE NO OTHER" xD) "That's not important," She grumbled. Yeah, it was a shit impression, so what? It wasn't her fault he sounded like the narrator of a Ford commercial.

"Well I don't like charity," She countered with the stubbornness of a small child in need of a nap.

"Uh-huh, and you knew what it'd mean to take it," Glory argued sensibly, for once. It was a pretty rare occurrence, really. "Well... Jupiter's big as fuck, so I don't think it'd be that hard to find," She said, wrinkling her nose. She could point out the planet easily, though that wasn't all that big a deal since she'd studied astronomy. The dog hadn't though, so here was another of those less sensible arguments.

Glory chuckled when the dog, who definitely spoke English, jumped up and ran, as per usual. That thing ran on high-octane racing fuel or something. She found herself sorta cold without Leo's warmth pressed against her, and it made her wish they didn't have to get up and go so she could just continue to enjoy his presence. She sighed, grabbed a stick that was conveniently within reach, and called Lucy over. "C'mere dog, help me up." Lucy, understanding perfectly somehow - or just wanting to play with the stick, who knows - grabbed it and pulled Glory upright. It took a moment for everything to steady out again, since, according to the vertigo, she'd stood up too fast. The thigh the Corrupted had stabbed ached and threatened to deposit Glory back on the ground, but it was apparently bluffing, thankfully.

"Ready to go?" She asked.

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

"Oh good. Gotta make sure I'm not too big of a disappointment," Glory said with a sigh of relief.

"Well that's what I did the first time, and it definitely didn't help the case of Why Not to Admit Glory O'Brienn Dwyer to a Psych Ward Immediately," She said with a snort. It did the opposite, actually. Imagine that.

"Your father had human anatomy?" Glory snorted, trying to keep a straight face, "Don't tell me you sack-whacked that motherfucker." First, he probably DID, and second, that whoremaster definitely deserved it.

"Well, this certain someone accepts the apology, on the terms you try immediately to make up for it," Glory said diplomatically.

-

"Very tentative, but sure," She agreed with a snort. Glory wasn't one that cheered up easily, nor did she NEED cheering up, thank you very much.

"It was fucking hilarious I will remember it forever and think of it and almost smile," She snickered. It was arguably one of the funniest things she heard that didn't contain any swears. (Because Leo felt trapped in a corner and doubled down in the opposite direction trying to escape xD I told ya, I remember too well ;_;)

"Oh fuck, alright sure. You do," She sighed defeatedly. Not like she could argue anyway. Dammit.

Glory sighed and said, "That's true, I do." Why must she possess the human attribute of amusement? What a pain in the ass.

"Well what'd you expect, cheering every time the students saw you, a paid 3 week vacation at a beach resort, and no work?" She asked. Somehow that sounded like an absolute nightmare to Glory. She'd fuckin hate that, which only added to the idea she wasn't human. She DID, however, keep herself entertained with Mud Pit. Now, Mud Pit was a highly competitive sport with the students, where on the north side of the Academy, the side less frequently used likely because beyond it lay the mountain range and thus didn't have the vast forests to work with [oh how terrible it was to walk UPHILL], a mud pit was kept. The premise was simple, it was sort of just wrestling but in a mud pit and with far fewer penalties and safety rules. The students loved it, for whatever reason - probably because Glory'd often borrow a class for the whole period - and it kept Glory entertained. There was also a game called Bloodhound, where one person, often Glory because the kids liked it better, would take a sponge soaked with blood and run through the woods. This was the Runner, and they marked a tree every so often with the blood to leave a trail. The Bloodhounds had to exercise the tracking skills they'd been taught in class within a set amount of time. The time limit and the Runner's boundaries varied depending on the day and the skill of the group. Glory'd managed to make both games HIGHLY competitive, and it was like getting the lead role in a play when one was chosen to participate. She hadn't been able to do so in a while though, so the first-years wouldn't know the joy of being selected to roll around in a mud puddle and run through the woods, but once her and Leo got back, she'd be fixing that. That thought brought about a sudden realization. "You've never participated in Mud Pit," She said to Leo, kind of forgetting about context in the moment.

"Right, and space is right above your head, and that's actually a missile," Glory countered.

"Alright then, what's today's chosen mode of transportation, sir?" She asked with a snicker.